Healing Tohru
by Animeangel2
Summary: Here is chapter 17. Hatori does have a soft side, who knew? How do the Sohmas handle Tohrus attack? How does Tohru handle it? Has their lives changed forever. Chapter one is rated M. Others are T
1. Tohrus Attack

_I don't own fruits basket or its characters. This is the redone one hopefully I have gotten most of the grammar mistakes. And it is easier to read through. Reviews are always welcome. I tried to capture Tohru's trusting attitude a bit more, though later in the story she will be OCC, b/c no one that goes through this is ever the same. Oh and this chapter is still rated M. Hope you enjoy_

**Chapter 1: Thorus Attack**

"Damnit! Where's Tohru? I'm hungry." Kyo, said kicking the table

"Kyo-chan, she is working, You know that. It wouldn't hurt you to go pick her up every once in a while. Wouldn't it ?" Shigure said masterfully picking up his tea in time to avoid Kyos kick. "Did you really have to break my table?"

"That damn rat picks her up" Kyo said "I'll fix me something to tide me over."

"Yes, but Yuki, called a few minutes ago and said that he would be at the school late, finishing up some student council work. We don't want our little flower out at dark by herself." The dog smirked "Maybe I'll go pick her up? I don't get to spend enough time alone with her."

"You pervert, I'll go she should be almost home by now anyway." Kyo said slamming out the door.

_Kyos so predictable. _Shigure thought to himself. He sipped his tea, trying to fight off an uneasy feeling that he started having since Yuk, had called.

_Wow we finished really early tonight. _Tohru thought as she looked at her watch. _ Guess I will be able to start the laundry, after I finish studying._ The sun was going down when she left the building.

"Yuki-san?", She said looking around. "Well it is still a bit early I'll just wait." She looked at her watch it was 7:45. _He'll definitely be here by eight._

She tried to go back into the changing room. Pulling on the door, she remembered that the back door could only be opened from the inside. The front doors were looked when the last business man left the building. _Oh well, she_ thought cheerfully, _I'll just wait out side, it's a clear night. Yuki is late tonight, that's not like him. I hope everything is okay. I'll just start home, that's a good idea. Right mom, I lived in a tent I can walk myself home._

She had gotten to the front of the alley, when she heard a sound behind her. "Yuki-san?" She said turning. _No one there. I've got to much imagination._

"Excuse miss? Can you help me?" _There was someone back there_. She thought turning around. He was about Shigures height he had light brown hair he's eyes where shadowed but he seemed to be really worried about something.

"Oh yes, I'd be happy too." She said smiling. She put her bag down against the wall and started walking back into the alley. _Maybe he is sick._

"I've dropped my keys and I'm in a hurry, if I'm late my wife will kill me can you help me look." he said smiling helplessly. "I'm such a klutz."

She giggled a bit. "I 'd be glad to." She said walking back to the alley. A voice in the back of her head told her she was stupid and that she shouldn't be doing this. _That's such an odd thought, I mean Mom always said to be trusting of people, that deep down everyone was good. Besides why would anyone want to hurt me. And Yuki should be showing up any time out of breath and apologizing for being so late. _"Where did you drop them at?"

"I was throwing out the trash and I think they fell out of my pocket. Over by the dumpster back there, I know this is a little strange, but I thought I needed a good pair of eyes to help me look." He said shifting on his feet. "Getting old, well it just isn't any fun." He looked back and she was following him. "A girl as pretty as you. I bet you have a boyfriend."

Tohru blushed. "Oh no"

"So you wasn't waiting on anyone to walk you home, that's not safe you know that." He said. "I'll tell you what as soon as we find my keys, I'll give you a ride home"

"Oh, I couldn't ask you to do something like that." She stammered out._ He really is just a nice man._ "you work in one of the other offices I work in that one" pointing towards the door she had came out of.

"I know" He said moving closer behind her.

"You know?" She said looking up smiling

"Oh yeah, I've seen you leaving a couple of times. That's why I asked if you have a boyfriend. He is usually here to pick you up"

"Yuki-san, he is one of my best friends". She said blushing furiously, "I'm not sure why he isn't here. He usually is but he is really late tonight, and I have homework and dinner to start and laundry, so I was just going to walk myself home."

"That's not to safe," He said smirking, "A girl as pretty as you, you could run into trouble, I guess it is your lucky night, that I'm here a mean." He finished amused by the girls blushing.

Not sure what to do she giggled and turned back to the looking around the dumpster..

"You have beautiful hair" He said and reached out to stroke it.

She flinched. _Maybe I was wrong, what is Kyo always telling me, when I'm by myself. _ "What are you?"..she said turning around

The guy grabbed her arms and pulled him towards her. She began to struggle "Please, let me go"

"Quiet stop fighting"..He moved his lips over her neck one of his hands moving up her shirt He had her arms easily pinned in his other hand above her head.

"Please stop she".she tried to scream but it came out as a whisper, "Please" twisting herself.

"I don't want to hurt you but if you don't stop I'll hit you." Shoving her against the wall pinning her with his body one hand holding her arms up above her head. "You are so pretty", spreading her legs with his knee.

"Stop it please" she said begging and beginning to cry. _Yuki will show up any minute, Yuki please hurry_. She threw her weight to one side when his reached her most private area. Catching him off guard she was able to get her arms free.

"You bitch", he said before striking her and throwing her to the ground.

_Stars ,_ she thought for a second opening her eyes. _It was a dream._ Then he was on her spreading her legs roughly with his knee tearing her panties away with one hand while the other held her. "I will knock you out and do what I want anyway, just relax you might enjoy this I said stop, do you really want to be out, I might accidentally hit you to hard, then you'd die" . He said laughing and he brought himself to her and roughly started moving himself in and out.

The pain was red hot. _Pain doesn't have a color but this time it does its red. _She tried to scream but her voice wouldn't work. _"Mom where are you?"_

"Turn over bitch!" Forcing her over on her stomach he begin to spread her ass cheeks open. "Hmmm nice" he said putting a finger in...

"NO PLEASE STOP PLEASE DON"T!" she screamed out loud finally finding her voice.

"I told you to fucking relax" taking hear head and slamming it in the pavement

_I can't pass out ,_she thought. He turned her back over. "I'm not done. Kiss me". He pressed his mouth around her hers forcing his tongue into her mouth, she gagged on his tongue it tasted like stale cigarettes and beer. "Put your arms around me". She shook her head. "Now bitch I'll hurt you," She felt her mind drift from her body as he started taking her again. "NOW!" She reached up and place her arms on his shoulders in the state of a sleep walker.

_Mom there you are. 'I knew you liked the beach Tohru, hang on just a while longer." _In her mind she was at the beach with her mother happier times. He thrust one last time and moaned. He wiped his sweaty forehead on her shirt. _Why me what did I do to deserve this _she thought staring up at the stars. _Mom yuki Kyo shigure where are you? _He finally stood up and finished dressing himself he looked around satisfied that no one was there.

"I'm sorry I told you I didn't want too hurt you." Pulling her up to sitting position. "See your not hurt to bad". She couldn't look at him, but wouldn't give him the satisfaction of any more tears. All she could do was shake. Her legs and other areas where hurting so bad, she wasn't sure if she would be able to stand again

"What are you going to do about this?" he asked. She looked at him sharply. "I mean," he continued "this was your fault, you came back in to this alley with me, and your skirt barely covers anything. No one will believe you, there's really nothing you can do." He kissed her harshly on the mouth. He stood and laughed and walked away.

She looked around panicky for a few moments, _did that really happen_. She touched her head, blood. Tried to stand but her legs were jelly she sat back down roughly her legs out in front of her, more blood. _Oh god it really happened to me_. She thought and she let the tears come, sitting in the dirty alley way she made a pitiful sight as the truth of what happened, that her being so naive and trusting, that he took something ore than just her virginity, how can she be around anyone now, they will know she is damaged and used, and that it was her fault. She laid down against the wall and cried till she passed out.


	2. Blood and Tears

**AN: Not to much done to this chapter, just edited some of the mistakes. And the thoughts are now in italics, hope it makes it easier to read. Thank you all so much for your reviews and suggestions. **

Chapter 2: Tears and Blood

_I hope I don't run into that damn Yuki _Kyo thought hurrying to the building where Tohru worked. _Where is everyone _looking at the dark building and the empty parking lot. _I wonder if Yuki got finished first and picked her up. But I didn't pass them n the way home. They could have went another way or stopped by his garden. Stupid rat thinks his secret garden is a secret. I'll check the back entrance though in case she is waiting back there. Surely she wouldn't have left by herself He though stepping into the alley_

"Welcome home Yuki"

"Where is everyone?" Yuki asked looking at the writer sitting at the empty table by himself.

"Kyo went to pick up Tohru, since you were working late, he left about a hour ago. "Shigure answered, not notching the alarmed look on Yuki's face.

"But Shigure its 10 pm. She usually heads home by at the latest 8:30?" Yuki said. _I hope nothing happened to her_

"Maybe her and Kyo decided to go n a date. "He answered with a teasing grin. Suddenly the grin fell from his face.

"What is it, why do YOU look so serious all of a sudden?" Yuki asked. The dog hardly ever looked serious.

"Something's wrong?" Before he could get his sandals on Yuki had took off out the door into the night

_No one is back here_. Kyo thought. _What's that_, turning his head towards a sound near the dumpster on his left.

"Who's there?" He said out loud and was answered with a muffled cry and the rustling of debris on the alley ground. He stepped closer focusing his eyes. _At least being the cat comes in handy for something I can see good in the dark_ "Tohru?" Seeing a small figure pressed close the dumpster as if trying to disappear. "Tohru?" approaching the figure. _This can't be Tohru, on the dirty ground hiding. Why would she be hiding._

"No please don't hurt me anymore leave me alone" the figure started screaming and pressing herself closer to the dumpster. "NO! get away!"

_It is Tohru what happened _he ran to her side. Grabbing her arms, "Tohru its me Kyo."

He was answered with a wailing crying and small fist attacking him. "I don't care if you kill me, you aren't going to hurt me anymore."

"Stop it !Tohru what happened ?"pulling her arms down and pulling her out to the dim lights in the alley. "Oh my god!" seeing her for the first time blood covered the left side of her face and she was starting to bruise her lip was swelled and blood had dried on her legs "Tohru what ?"

She sank back to the ground crying. "Kyo? "She whispered ,"He hurt me" before falling into a silent state that scared Kyo more than the fighting and screaming Tohru he had found.

Kneeling beside her "Tohru? Tohru what happened who hurt you?" She wouldn't answer but clung to him as if her life depended on it. _Hang on Tohru I'll get you home and get you some help_.

He bent to pick her up when he lifted her. She cried in pain. "Please don't it hurts "she whispered. He sit her back down and stared up into the sky. _How can I help her I don't want to hurt her anymore than she has been hurt. I'll kill whoever did this._

Yuki looked back at the house as he took off seeing shigure on the phone leaving the house didn't ease his fears. _I've not seen Shigure so serious. If something happened to Honda-san I'll never forgive myself. If Kyo has hurt her I'll kill him._ In record time he made it to the building, He saw no signs of anyone but noticed several rats running into the alley. He took off again but stooped a few feet later. He saw Tohru sitting on the ground Kyo standing over her. _What's on his shirt. Blood?_

"You stupid cat? What did you do to her?"

Kyo turned suddenly, " I didn't do this I found her over by the dumpster she is hurt bad." He didn't get he sentence out before Yuki struck him in the face sending him flying to the opposite wall.

"Damn rat!" returning the punch the he looked at Tohru.

"Yuki you came?" Yuki heard a whisper say from the ground and caught a look at Thorus face covered with dry blood and dried tears. She put her head back down on her knees He sit beside her.

"Tohru-san what happened did Kyo do this?" He asked urgently not taking his eyes off the cat who was glaring at them.

"Kyo no, he didn't…why wasn't you here?" and she began to weep pitifully again.

"We have to get her out of here Kyo get her to Hatori or back to the house". Yuki said for once forgetting the feud.

"I tried to pick her up but she started screaming that she was hurting? I didn't want to ." Kyo trialed off as a rat came from near where he found Tohru ,_what's he got_? Kyo and Yuki's face went three shades whiter when the realized what the rat was carrying to yuki. A torn pair of panties.

"She has blood on her legs too. "Kyo whispered

"I'll kill the son of a bitch "Yuki said

"What is the problem Shigure?" Hatori said as he picked him up at the end of the driveway. "Where is Tohru, you said she is hurt?"

"She is Hari " Shigure said. "I'm not sure where she is. Yuki had to work late at the school and Kyo went to pick her up but was running late…I just got this awful feeling that something was wrong and could almost her screaming."

Hatori just nodding and turned the car around taking off in the direction of town. The_ dog does have his uses, he has the best instincts of all of us._

"There!" Shigure said opening the door before the car could stop taking off into the alley. "Kyo Yuki where's Tohru?" Kyo was standing in front of them and yuki was talking softly to Tohru who was still in a ball on the ground they were trying to convince her that she needed to let them carry her.

"Shigure, she is hurt, we can't move her, there's blood and she was crying and torn panties.." The cat was trying to explain.

"Oh god" Hatori said moving past Kyo. "Yuki back up". He had his black bag with him.

Shigure went to the other side of Tohru. "Darling its us?" He said and touched her head.

"NO !don't touch me !"she stood up as his hand touched her hair. "Get away from me "and tried to stand but her legs gave out. She laid on the ground crying. Her legs were dirty and covered in dried blood. Shigure had to turn his head from the sight.

"Help her Damnit Hatori you're a doctor." Kyo said.

"Okay I am going to need someone to hold her while I give her a shot its just a sedative so we can get her back to the house I'll examine her more there." Hatori quickly explained pulling a small syringe from his bag.

Kyo nodded his head and went to where the girl was weeping and crying. "Tohru, no one is going to hurt you anymore. I swear ". He gently turned her over. "Hatori is here "he said., trying to look past the bruises and fresh tears. "He is going to help you. I'm so sorry I didn't show up earlier"

"Kyo" she said and tried to hold on to him as Hatori straighten her arm out.

"This is going to hurt just a bit Tohru." the doctor said quietly. _Even Akito couldn't have done this to her_. She didn't scream or fight as he put the needle in her arm she just moaned and fresh set of tears streaked down her cheeks making the blood look fresh. She relaxed in Kyos arms. "Okay we can put her in the back"

Kyo lifted her gently she moaned. "Tohru? Its okay. I'm sorry.." She tried to put her arms around his neck but they felt like they weighed fifty pounds . Shigure opened the back door and helped Kyo in with the girl.

"Yuki? "Shigure said "We'll all sit up front".

Yuki nodded his head. _This is my fault. I should have gotten a hold of her at work. Or called Shigures earlier to let them know I wouldn't be here. I'm so selfish._

Hatori started back to Shigures house. The interior light was on so he could keep an eye on Tohru through the rearview mirror. The girl was much paler than she should be so where yuki and Kyo for that fact. And the two boys had her blood on them. He glanced over and looked a shigure who nodded his head as if to agree, _they will be blaming themselves a long time for this_


	3. Tohrus Examination

-1**AN: Just a few small edits. I know that the characters may seem a little OCC but this is a high stress situation.**

Chapter 3: Thorus Examination

Kyo carried Tohru into the house and put her down in her bed.

"Kyo, she was like this when you found her?" Hatori said.

"Yes, you don't think?" the cat began.

"No I need you to tell me how she was when you found her?"

"Okay I didn't see her at first because she was sitting so close to the dumpster, when I went to her she started screaming till she realized who I was. When I tried to pick her up she started screaming again saying she was hurt."

Hatori looked and Shigure, "I'm going to have to examine her, to see how damaged she is."

Shigure turned paled but nodded his head. "We'll also have to get her cleaned up, the only thing is well I'm not sure how she is going to react to being around men."

"Why would she act any different around us?" Kyo asked.

For the time being there was no answer. Yuki was standing at the door. _I can't believe I was late, I had to stay and work late. I should have been there for her. This would have never happened. Why would someone beat Honda-san up, she never carries much money with her. _Looking at the pitiful form on the bed.

"Yuki, Kyo do you know the numbers to her friends, we may need there help cleaning her up. I want to keep her meditated tonight for the examination." Hatori said. "Well go call them and tell them to hurry. She may need to be in the hospital, I'll have to ask Akito to see if he will allow her to use the family hostile at the main house."

Shigure nodded. "So you don't think Akito did this? You can erase memories maybe we should just her up and let you erase them. I mean this is going to be hard enough for her to deal with."

"No" Hatori said quickly, "That choice should be hers, we shouldn't take that choice away from her. Don't you think enough of her choice was taken?" _Though in the end even if she wants the memories gone, Akito will have to allow it_

"Sorry" the dog said, looking scolded.

Yuki was standing outside the door when he over heard the conversation about erasing her memory. _Why would they want to erase her memory, she is going to be scared to be around us. _He thought as it dawned on him what happened to her. _Oh god, this is my fault_.

Kyo came around the corner for a second he was going to say something to yuki, but even the look on yuki face stopped the age-old battle. "What?" he asked.

"Do you have any idea what happened to Honda-san?" yuki asked quietly.

"Someone beat her up, probably Akito." Kyo said

"Think about it, you stupid cat, why would she have no panties on, and blood on her legs, and why would they want to erase her memories, why would she be scared to be alone with us….she's lived her for months now.."

"Don't call me stupid, damn rat" Kyo mumbled as he slid down the wall, the fact slowly sinking n on him, that Tohru had been violated and hurt much worse than he realized. "They are on their way" He said as he went out the front door. He headed to roof to think, but all he could do was cry_. I can't believe I didn't go pick her up sooner, its all my fault._

Yuki slid the door open,. "Hanajima and Uotana are on their way"

"Okay, Yuki-san I'm going to ask you wait outside while I do this. She may scream some but I'm going to try to keep her sedated enough so she isn't hurt anymore than what she already has been. "

"Is she going to be okay?" Yuki asked

"We'll see, I'm going to do everything I can for her. But if you mean is she going to die tonight, no she'll live."

"though she may wish she had die" Shigure mumbled receiving scalding looks from Hatori and Yuki.

"I don't understand, I mean I think I know what happened, but I don't understand."

" I don't either" Hatori said, wondering if erasing her memories of this night might not be the best thing for her. "Okay I need to get started. Shigure go get some warm water I'll just start with her face. I'll have the other girls help her in the shower after I'm done."

Yuki stepped out of the room and went to his to think, the house is awful quite. _If something more happens to her, I'll never forgive myself._

"Tohru, can you hear me, its Hatori and Shigure, I'm going to take a look at you and see how badly you are hurt. I'll tell you what I'm doing as I do it. I'm just going to wash your face off first." Her eyes fluttered opened and she moaned.

"Can you tell us what happened?" Shigure asked ringing out a wash cloth .

Instead of answering she just started to cry. "Please don't hurt me. She mumbled and shook as Hatori stared washing her face off. " Why?" She mumbled and forced her self to stay still when she started cleaning her bruised face. I'll just go back to sleep, this nightmare has to be almost over. The wounds on her face consisted of a black eye, a bruise to her left temple and her lip was busted, her teeth looked okay.

"Okay shigure I'm going to nee to check her upper body" Hatori said noticing the bruises on her arms. "Get her robe to cover her. I'm going to have to take your shirt off Tohru. Or do you want to try." She didn't respond. "Help me sit her up"

They sat her up as Hatori start to pull the shirt up over her. She began to scream. "No NO not again, haven't you hurt me enough."

"Tohru, we are trying to help you calm down, baby we won't hurt you" Shigure said.

Her eyes were open and she was staring at him, but not seeing him. All she could see was the face of her attacker the brown eyes and light colored hair. "NO NO" Was all she kept screaming and the tears never stopped running down her face. Shigure looked helplessly at Hatori.

"I'll have to sedate her again" Moving to his bag and getting another syringe. "Hold her arm out." Shigure held her arm out and looked away as he gave her some more medicine. "Okay that should….."

"Where's Tohru?" Uo-chan said as she enter the room. "What the hell happened to her"

"Shigure take them out side and explain it to them, With her under I'll be able to finish this myself.. Call Aktio when your done, I would like to use the main house at least a day or two I'm not sure how she'll react when she is completely awake and the reality hits her."

"Where's Kyo and Yuki? Shigure asked as he guided the two girls outside.

"Kyo sis on the roof, Yuki I haven't seen. Now what happened to our Tohru, you guys were suppose to protect her." Hana-san began.

" Tohru went to work, Yuki usually walks her home, he called to say he would have to be late tonight to finish his work up at the school, Kyo went to pick her up around 9..."

"But she gets off around 8:30" uo-chan interrupted.

The writer just held up his hand. He swallowed heard and continued. "Yuki got in about 10, I didn't think anything about it. I thought Kyo and her may have stopped at the store or something on the way home. Kyo found her by the dumpster in the back of the building. She was hiding and beat up. He couldn't carry her, she was saying it hurt. I got a feeling something was wrong. When we got there, she was crying and covered in blood, her underwear was….." He stopped and noticed the girls , they just nodded, he didn't need to finish they knew what had happened.

"Shouldn't she be in the hospital?" They asked.

"Hatori is a doctor, he will take care of her, he wants your alls help washing her off, she probably isn't going to want any men around her. I need to call the head of the family, girls if you will excuse me.. Our family has a small hospital on the main estate. We are going to see if she can stay there for a day or two."

They nodded. About that time Hatori came out the room looking sick. He had finished the examination and even under sedation Tohru had cried and begged him to stop. He had never seen anything as bad, not even when Akito took his eye.. She had several bruises on her arms one on her breast, as well as a bite mark on her left one. She thighs were terrible bruised, legs cut up and scraped probably where she had fallen and scooted around on the pavement. Her insides where also torn and bruised. The bleeding came from inside where she had lost her virginity with an extreme about of force. "She is still a bit out of it, but a shower will help her at least feel a little cleaner. Do you all mind helping her. I don't want to put her through any more."

They nodded and went into the room to see about their friend.


	4. The Sohmas

-1**AN: I don't own fruits basket or any of its characters much to my dismay. Spoilers, this story doesn't follow the anime or magna, but if you haven't met the whole zodiac yet, then there could be some character spoilers, so you have been warned. Reviews of any kind are more than welcome. Thanks to all that have reviewed so far. I'll check out your stories also. I guess that's enough rambling by little old me. On to chapter 4. I figure in this chapter I'll look into how this is effecting Tohru's family a bit. **

Chapter 4: The Sohma's

"Shigure, go and get Yuki and Kyo I'm going to talk to them in a few minutes after I talk to Akito." Hatori said as he went into the library to call the head of the family. He wasn't holding out much hope for Akito to allow Tohru to use the family hospital but in this case it was worth a try.

On the roof the cat was laying down staring at the stars and thinking to himself. _I should have left sooner, instead of complaining about being hungry. Why didn't I sense she was in trouble. Why would anyone do that to her. This is all my fault. I can't get that image of her out of my head. Of all people she shouldn't have been hunkered down by the dumpster in that dirty alley. God I hope she is okay. If she doesn't make it or doesn't get better. How will I survive? _This last thought took him by surprise as he sit up._Wait no she isn't going to want to see me. She has to blame me too. _

"Kyo-kun come down, Hatori wants to talk with all of us in a few minutes." Shigure said from the ground, there was no joking or teasing from the dog tonight. He was just as serious as anyone had ever seen him.

"Akito, something terrible has happened." Hatori began explaining the situation without going into to much detail, no point in giving Akito anymore ammunition against the poor girl.

"Why should I care what happens to her?" Was the answer he received. "The beast could die and then I would be a million times happier."

This was the answer he was expecting. "As you wish, but I am her doctor so I will be over here checking up on her till she is better."

"Is that an order from you Hatori? Remember who is in charge here. At anytime I could tell you to erase her memory and not only hers…" Akito let the threat sit in the air. He had no patience for this girl and the way she was messing up his family. Her dying would be a blessing, but Hatori had said nothing about her dying, so I wonder what is really going on with her. I may have to visit shigure house soon and see. "I expect you to keep my appointment in the morning as always, then you can waste all the time you want with that little pest, because my dragon you will always come to me when I call won't you."

Gritting his teeth, he answered, "you know I will"

"Now I'm tired, don't bother me with any foolishness any more tonight." Akito said hanging up the phone.

_Poor Tohru_, Hatori thought. _There isn't much that I can do for you. Keep you comfortable and make sure there are no complication_. Erasing her memory might be a blessing, but he would have to get permission to do that from Tohru and Akito both. Getting it from Akito would be nearly impossible and god only knows what kind of torture, he would inflict on the girl. He wondered vaguely if he would be able to sleep at all tonight or would he see her bruised , torn and battered body in his dreams, no one deserve treatment like that.

Yuki was sitting in his room trying to block out the crying he heard coming from the bathroom and the gentle comforting she was receiving from her two friends. He put his head down on his desk and tried to not cry. His Tohru was hurting and he could do nothing to help her. He was afraid that when he looked into her eyes, he would see blame. The same blame he was inflicting on himself. _If only I hadn't stayed late, or if I had mentioned it to her before she left school. Of course I didn't know then I wouldn't be able to walk her home. Why would anyone want to do that to any person, much less her. I wonder if she will be able to smile again_. He sighed and got up from his chair, he began pacing the room. _I need to know who did this to her. Did Akito? Is this one of sick punishments he feels entitled to give people. _

He closed his eyes a minute and all he could see was Kyo holding her in the back of the car, talking softly to her. A side of the cat he hadn't ever seen. _Why wasn't I the one holding her? I want to be the one to help her. But I am the cause of this. I should have left he meeting early and at least walked her home_.

"Yuki, don't blame yourself" Shigure said from the door "Come to the library in a few minutes Hatori wants to talk to all of us."

Shigure felt a tug at his heart as he passed the bathroom and heard her asking her friends "Why?" Over and over again.

For all his teasing and joking with her, he felt a strange need to protect and like Yuki and Kyo he was blaming himself. _I'm an adult, but I couldn't even help her I couldn't get off my ass and go pick her up. Now she was hurting in the worst way any one could imagine and there was nothing anyone can do to make it better, no shot, no miracle._

He entered the library and found Hatori staring at the floor smoking a cigarette.

"Akito said no" Shigure said lighting one for himself

"You don't sound surprised" Hatori answered. "Are Yuki and Kyo coming.?"

"Yes, they are blaming themselves." the dog answered lifting his eyes to the ceiling.

"You are too" Hatori answered and watched his friend nod his head. "You know this was no ones fault."

"Still if one of us had been there. Did you notice in the Kyo was able to hold her against him, and he didn't change. Do you think?"

Hatori held up his hand, he had noticed and wondered the same thing. "If anything could come out of this something good.." He stopped short as he noticed Yuki standing in the door.

"Would you get out of the damn way you stupid rat." Kyo said pushing his way into the library. Yuki was paler than normal Hatori noticed and wondered how long the boy had been standing there, he didn't even respond to Kyo instead he sit down quietly on the couch .

"Is Tohru ok? Kyo asked sitting in the floor near the door. When given the option to sit in the floor or in a chair the cat was more comfortable sitting where he could streach out at leisure.

Hatori shook his head. _How do I explain this to them. I don't even understand it myself_. "Her wounds will heal, at least the ones on the outside. She will probably be in bed for a few days because of soreness. Do you to um know what happened to her?"

"Was she raped?" Yuki asked quietly, he knew what it was what it meant but had never seen anyone who had been before, he knew the answer to the question but he didn't know how to handle it. Kyo glared at the floor like he was contemplating trying to kill it. He wanted to, needed to know the answer to this.

"Yes" The doctor sighed and inhaled the cigarette before putting it out. "She was a virgin before this, so this make the attack much worse for her. Physically and physiologically. There really is no way to predict how she will act. She may not leave her room for a while. She may not want to be around men, even you all. We'll have to keep a close on her to make sure she doesn't try to hurt herself. She will probably have nightmares, if she is able to sleep. I can give her some medicine to help with those."

"She is going to need us to be kind and understanding to her. The least we can do is keep the house cleaned up and do some cooking." Shigure said "And I'll call the school give them a brief explanation and see where to go from there. I'm not going to speak with her grandfather yet. And I don't want you all to tell any other family members, she may not want anyone to know."

"Who the fuck would do this to her?" Kyo asked standing up and staring at each one in the room.

"We don't know, when she is able to talk about I'll ask her if she knew the person.

"I'm going to kill him" he said.

"For once, I agree with you. "Yuki said from the couch. "I'll help her on any school work, when she begins to feel better." He added, _if she ever does_.

The four men sit quietly listening to the feet shuffling up stairs and the three girls made their way back to the bedroom.

"Can I see her now" Kyo asked quietly his eyes were shiny with tears and he kept his head turned sharply from Yuki. But for once the two enemies shared the same feelings and thoughts. _She has to know that I'm sorry_ they both thought.

Yuki got up and walked to the door. "I'll check on her in the morning I'm going for a walk."

Shigure nodded. _Poor Yuki_, he thought, he is holding everything in. Kyo too.

Hatori answered, "Let me check and make sure she is comfortable, but like I said she may not want to be around anyone."

_I just have to know if she blames _Kyo thought as he followed the doctor out of the room.


	5. I Don't Blame You, Kyo

-1**AN: Again just the basic revisions No change to the plot or anything. Thank you all for your reviews. I hope you are enjoying this story.**

Chapter 5: I don't blame you , Kyo.

Hatori entered the room, Tohru was lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling. She was sweating, but then she was under four blankets had her pajamas on and a robe. Kyo stood in the door way, not looking at her, trying to make sense of his feelings. But knowing that he was going to stay with her or by her tonight even if it meant sleeping outside the door. She would know that he wouldn't let anything hurt her and that he was sorry that he was so hard headed and wasn't there when she needed him most.

"How is she doing" The doctor asked her friends.

"She is well I'm not sure, it took us forever to convince her to undress and take a shower. She is burning up she has to be but refuses to remove any clothes." Hana-chan said.

Hatori nodded his head and sit down beside girl. He reached out to touch her head and she jerked back further into the bed. "Its just me Tohru. I wouldn't hurt you. I just wanted to check on you before I went home for the night. I'm leaving some sleeping pills with Shigure, he'll be back into check on you later. I want you take one now before I leave. And I will come back in the morning."

"School" She whispered.

"Tohru, you aren't going to try and go to school tomorrow? We'll tell everyone you are sick. You'll be able to make up the work." The Yankee replied.

"Could you all give me and Tohru some privacy for a min, I'll drop you girls off on my way home."

Hatori said.

"Shouldn't we stay with her?" Uo-chan said.

"We can take care of her" Kyo said from the door.

"Yeah I can see that" she replied.

Kyos face got pale and he almost hissed "Yankee - Bitch" Before storming down the hall.

"No, ladies, listen it would be best for her if her schedule remains the same or close to it at least until I can see how she is going handle this." the dragon explained in a hushed voice by the door. "And they will watch over her." He finished and shut the door.

"Here" handing her a small pill and glass of water. "it should keep you asleep the rest of the night."

He watched the young girl sit up painfully and take the pill. She looked at him with so much hurt and pain in her eyes. He was once again reminded of Kana, and wondered if anything short of erasing her memory like he had done hers would bring back that optimistic look to her brown eyes.

"Why did this happen to me Hatori?" She didn't cry when she asked this but looked so hurt and lost he wanted to hold her like he would have Kana years ago. But he was unable to give her any comfort.

"I don't know, I honestly don't." He said sitting on the bed. "I'll bring you something for the pain tomorrow., I'm sorry I would have liked to had you in the hospital tonight just to keep an eye on. But Akito said no."

She just nodded. "I shouldn't have walked into the alley with him" Starting to cry again.

"Now honey," Taking the glass from her. "We will talk about it tomorrow, right now the most important thing is for you to rest."

"Kyo carried me didn't he?" She asked laying down the pill already starting to take effect.

"Yes. He wants to come in a see you." Hatori said standing up.

"I'm surprised anyone can look at me I'm damaged" As she chocked back a sob and turned towards the window. "Its starting to rain" She whispered.

He turned off the light. She shot straight up in the bed. "NO! Leave the light on!" He turned it back on and watched as she laid down, he hoped that the pill would start fully working soon and she wouldn't fight the effects. He opened the door. Kyo was sitting at the top of the stairs, looking suddenly tired. The strain of this combined with the rain had almost wiped the cat out.

"Are you all ready?" Her two friends glanced towards the door and then nodded, they would do anything to help her and hated to leave her, but they to were at a loss on what to do next and they didn't want to start a fight and cause Tohru to get any more upset, so they went with Hatori

Hatori stepped over Kyo and said "She didn't say you couldn't come in" as he finished walking down the stairs.

Kyo looked up surprised. He watched them walk down the stairs. If her friends blamed him, then surely she would to.

Yuki had been laying on his bed and heard what Hatori had said to Kyo. _I wonder if she would want to see me to? How could she? _He lay there for a minute listening to the rain. Thinking back to what he over heard in the library and it was true Kyo hadn't turned into the cat, while holding her. _I should have been there_, he thought one final time before he went to sleep.

Shigure stood on the porch watching Hatori's car lights leaving. _I knew she would be the one to one day break the curse. No member of the zodiac had been able to hold a member of the opposite sex, like that_. But she was hurting and in pain. The writer wasn't sure how to handle this. He saw several dogs walking the property. He nodded before leaving himself, he had an idea. Something that might help, his flower feel safe again.

Kyo, stood at her doorway for several minutes. She was laying on her side, the light was on but she seemed to be asleep. Her hair laying in soft curls. "Tohru?" He said waling closer to the bed. She didn't answer. He reached out to touch her hair. He watched her soft breathing. And made a decision that he would stay in here tonight. He pulled her desk chair up to the bed and sit beside it. _No wonder I'm tired its raining, and its already 4AM_. Within minutes of sitting down he was asleep.

Tohru opened her eyes to the morning sunlight coming in her window. For a brief second wondered if she had just no suffered an incredibly realistic night mare. Till she tried to sit up and the pain was back her thighs ached her head hurt. She laid back down and stared at the ceiling. Fighting the rush of memories threatening to come through. She glanced towards her shut door. Then she noticed Kyo asleep in the chair his head in his arms on the bed. _He came to me last night and slept here. Why? I've really ruined everyone's life now. _She let the tears come silently as she got lost in thought. When she remembered how gentle he was with her when he found her and how he held her on the way home? _How did he hold me? _She wondered as she reached out for one of Kyos hand and slid hers in his.

He woke up with a start. And saw Tohru, tears streaking down her face staring at the ceiling. But her hand was in his. His heart hurt for a moment, _I want to hold her_.

"Kyo?" She whispered. "I don't blame you"

The cat sit there his eyes widened in surprise and he wished he knew what to do or say in a moment like this. He reached out the wipe away the tears. She jerked back some he left his had near her face and waited. After what seemed like hours of her silent sobbing. She nodded her head, and let him wipe away her tears.


	6. Hatori and Akito

-1**Authors note: Thanks for all the reviews. Keep em coming J! And I do take all suggestions into consideration, a little constructive critics never hurt no one. Right? For some reason I'm having a probably getting the bold and italics to transfer from the program I was using. If they don't show up this time around , I'll figure something else out. Well on with the story….Lets see if Hatori can keep it a secret from Akito. **

**Again just a few basic things. Nothing knew added to this chapter.**

Chapter 6: Hatori and Akito

"Master Akito, is ready for his check up" A maid said, jerking the doctor out of his train of thoughts.

"Tell him I'll be there momentarily " Standing up and putting his coat on. His lets out a deep sigh. _Akito, probably isn't even sick. He is just going to get me in there and question me about Thoru. _He started out towards Akitos part of the house and his thoughts drifted to her. When he had called Shigures this morning. Yuki had done left for school and Kyo was running late. Shigure had some surprising news about the cat, he had spent the night sleeping in a car beside her bed and had tried to make he0r eat this morning. She refused to eat and was sitting in her bed still bundled up staring at a picture of her mom and softly crying. _Kyo has certainly surprised me, I figured Yuki would be the one that would be right by her side, on the other hand it was usually Yuki that had picked her up from work. And surely he too had noticed that Kyo was able to hold her without transforming, at least he was last night. _He mused. He told shigure that he would be over there in the late morning after checking on his business at the main house. Shigure also said he needed to talk to him about something. And mentioned maybe Yuki would come around surely she is wondering if she has done something wrong and him not seeing her would make it worse, Kyo was going to the Dojo after school. He opened the door to Akitos room.

"There is my dragon, I knew you wouldn't forget me" Akito said sitting by the window in a long kimono giving him a cold smile. "You didn't stay at that dogs house last night did you?"

"No Akito-san I came back home." Hatori said bowing slightly. "We need to begin the check up."

"You want to check on her don't you, you would rather be with her right now than me" He accused

"She was hurt badly, Akito" He begin the usual morning examination.

"You won't tell me exactly how though will you, Hatori, tell me did the little bitch get hit by a car perhaps like her mother" Smiling evilly.

"No"

"No, I'm your god dragon, I can make you tell me."

Hatori started suddenly not liking the tone that his voice had taken. He silently prayed that, he wouldn't cause her more pain. "This is something that should be between the patient and his doctor."

Giving Hatori and evil smile. As he stretched. "Very well, I suppose this confidence has been extended to Shigures little family though, one of them will tell me. Whatever it was though the little bitch deserved it. I have half a mind to tell Shigure that the invitation to live at his house has expired and see how she ends up."

Hatori said nothing, having learned from bitter experience to not try and defy or argue with his master, for it would make the punishment on his victim that much worse.

"yes, put her out on the street, with her memories of course…or not when you go see the gorgon, tell Shigure I want him to visit this afternoon." Akito ordered. "And Hatori I would like it very much if you would join me for dinner tonight. She apparently survive the night, she wont need you tonight and I am going to."

Hatori nodded before leaving.

_Who does that little bitch think she is._ Not only had she succeeded in almost alienating the rat form her. Her favorite, Shigure, had even cut back his visit. And all he hears from Kisa and Momiji is Tohru-this and Tohru that. Akito thought angrily as he reached his hand out for a bird, who swiftly landed on his hand. As for the cat, well I don't care one way or the other, except the cat has seemed happier and more relaxed lately and that just won't do. _Yes this girl must be punished but first I have to find out what exactly is wrong with her. _There was a mall flutter in his hand, he looked down and noticed he was squeezing the bird. He continued squeezing the bird till he heard small pops thinking of how nice it would be to this to Thoru Honda. No one comes between me and my family. Dropping the dead bird into the yard below.

Hatori walked quickly back to his office to get some medicine and fresh bandages. He would have to warn Shigure, to not defy Akito, but to make it sound not so serious. _Surely even Akito wouldn't do that her, put her out on the street. Then again he was sure if he did one of her friends would take her in. But it was her mind he feared for. God only knows what kind of sick punishments that Akito would cook up for the poor child_, he thought smirking _yeah only god knows._


	7. Yukis Torment

-1**Authors Note: I really hope that you all are enjoying this fic. I know I'm having fun writing it, plus it is a bit healing for me okay getting to personalFinally figured out which way to save things to hold the bold and italics. Just a check review boldmy notes italicsthoughts. Nothing major changed here ethier.**

**This chapter, well we'll see how Yuki feels about this whole thing**

**Enjoy…Oh and I'm a huge Kyo fan…with Shigure as a close second .**

Chapter 7: Yuki's Torment

He woke up this morning, for once not running late. While he was washing his face, the events that took place the night before entered his sleep soaked mind. _I wonder if Tohru-kun is all right this morning.. I didn't hear her crying any last night. I'll check on before I go down to breakfast._

He stopped outside of the door, leading to the girls room, he heard her crying softly. And then he heard something strange, it sounded like Kyos voice talking softer than he had ever heard it. He cracked the door open, on the bed, something almost more heartbreaking than seeing his love, hurting was the scene before him. Tohru was laying on the bed crying softly. Kyo was seated beside her wiping the tears from her face. _That should be me, not that stupid cat_. He thought sadly and shut the door. His appetite gone. He decided to go on to school early.

When he arrived instead of going about his president duties. He sit in the hall in front of his locker. Lost in thought. Beating himself up, for not being there. _I know that she has to blame me. I blame me. I can't believe how selfish I am. She is never selfish she has always put us in front of herself. And how do I repay her I let this happen. I shouldn't have stayed late._

"Yuki? Yuki? Where's Tohru?" Momiji ran down the hall to the rat. Not noticing his mood, started to jabber about their plans for this weekend.

"Oh she is sick, she is at home?" The rat answered sadly, still not looking up.

"What's wrong can I come see her after school I'll make her a card." The rabbit said bouncing in place. "Maybe bring her flowers, make her soup? Where's Kyo?"

"Go start on that card" Haru said to Momiji. Always in tune with Yuki's feelings, it didn't take a genius to see that he was in pain and there was much more going on that her just being sick. "You're here early, and not busy with your fan club or the council?" Haru asked sliding down the wall beside his friend. "hey, earth to yuki?" Putting his hand Yuki's chin and lifting his face to his. His brown eyes searched Yuki's silver ones. "Danm, lets take a walk." Pulling the rat along with him, they made their way to the roof.

'Remember don't tell anyone, we can't risk Akito finding out yet. 'Hatori's warning came back to him as he put his head on the rail and sighed. "Haru?" He asked turning his head and looking at the young ox. "How did you get through well I did you deal with Rin hating you?"

"I've not, I still love her, and I know one day she will see that. I'm just waiting for her to see that." He answered running his hand through his two toned hair. "I didn't bring you up here to talk about me. You don't look good."

Sighing "Don't worry about me" Trying to smile. From this level he could see Kyo going into the school. _Stupid cat, what makes him think he can._. "You were right, Haru, its not easy protecting someone."

"Akito, get to Tohru? Did he hurt her like Rin?" Haru asked his normal glaze look replaced by one like a fire just starting.

"No, not Akito," _Great just what I need Haru turning black _"But she was hurt"

"Kyo?" His voice had changed to.. He cared for Tohru and was protective of her like she was a younger sistereven though she is younger than him to him, after all she had helped Kisa and all of them as well. "I'll kill any son of bitch that …."

Yuki held his hand up "Haru turning black won't help, and no it wasn't Kyo." He sighed again refusing to give into the tears that had been threating him all morning. " I hurt her, it was me, it was my fault."

"Huh?" The shock from that statement left the ox bewildered he knew that Yuki was in love with Tohru, even though he wouldn't admit it. "What did you do?"

"Well not me exactly, Haru I have to have your word that you won't say a thing to anyone about this." He waited till Haru nodded. "Last night, I had to stay late, doing some work for the council. I called the house to let them no I would be late. I didn't think to call her at work. And she apparently got sick of waiting and started to go home by herself. She didn't make it home. Someone attacked her and hurt her very bad, he beat her and he raped her. If I had been there, I could have stopped it." Yuki said in one breath.

"Who was it, we should kill this fucker?" Haru's black side coming back out.

"I don't know, she wasn't really talking much last night?"

"Well why aren't you home with her?" 1The ox asked in a cold tone.

"She isn't going to want me. And shigure is there, Hatori is coming over." The tears finally started to fall. As the rat said "And she has Kyo, he was there, this morning, he spent the night in her room, she doesn't need me, she hates me."

His love for Yuki over powered his black side. He took his friend in his arms. "No, you need to go to her, tell her your sorry I know her, she isn't going to hate you. I don't think she has ever hated anything in her life." He held his friend and kept talking softly to him. Letting Yuki cry, knowing how hard it is for any member of the Zodiac to be in love. Knowing how hard it is when you can't protect the one you love. Knowing the pain that Yuki is feeling. Stroking his friend sliver hair. He thought of Tohru, Yuki's words sinking him. Took him back years ago, to when was just a child. The ox shook his head, I'll not think of that now. Yuki needs me. "Hey, Hey come on" Haru said kissing the side of his head. For once Yuki didn't jerk back or glare or pull out of the embrace. That's when Haru knew this was serious. "Take the day off. Go to her. Talk to her"

_I can't believe that I'm standing here crying on Haru's shoulder like a baby. _Yuki thought but taking comfort in an embrace. " I can't take the day off, I need to get Tohru's assignments, and tell her teachers she will be out a while. Plus I never miss school."

Haru smiled at him. "No worries I'll do that"

Yuki sighed. "I still can't I mean …. I guess I could work on my garden some. There were some nice flowers that had started to bloom, Thoru liked them a lot."

"So go pick your lady some flowers and go to her" Haru said smiling. "Lets go."

_I can't believe I'm skipping school. _He thought as he walked to his and Tohru's "secret base". He sit in front of the garden for several minutes before he started wedding them out. It was almost has if Tohru was with him. He could hear he laughing when he would tickle her with a weed. And see her face turn a cute shade of pink. He could hear her talking. He could see her picking flowers, 'Just to brighten up the house.'

A few hours passed and his garden was wedded out and here wasn't nothing for him to do but go back home, He was to muddy to go to school. Even though he was more relaxed now. _Its funny_, he thought, _how gardening calms me down._ He started walking back the path to where the wildflowers were growing. _She'll like these, maybe they will cheer her up. Maybe she won't hate me_. Gathering up the brightest ones he could find.

The house was silent, except for the murmur of voices up stairs. HE walked up them. Hatori and Shigure were talking in the library.

He opened the door to Tohru's room. She was sitting on the edge of the bed. Not moving staring into to space, thought he bruises and bandages on her cheek. He could see that she was white.

"Tohru-kun?" He asked quietly "are you okay? Do you need Hatori?" She didn't move or make a sound. So he walked on in the room.

"Here I got these for you, just to brighten up your room?" Hoping to at least get a smile out of her. Still she didn't move. "I'll put them her in the vase beside your bed."

She still didn't move. So he sit on the bed beside her to take a closer look at her. _I wonder if she will be okay, should I get Hatori, I will in a minute I just need to say this to her. I wonder if she will hear me._

"Thoru-kun, I don't know if you are just ignoring me or what? He said softly, he reached out to take her hand, she jerked so he let his hand fall short. "I'm so sorry, I want you to forgive me. I didn't think anything would happen to you. Or that Kyo or Shigure would come pick you up. I didn't in a million years think you would start off by yourself. I'm so sorry." He finished and took her hand. " I wish you would talk to me, say something anything".

"Yuki-san?" She said blinking her eyes, like someone waking up. "Why were you so late?" She started shaking. "Where were you? She began to sob, Why did you let him hurt me?"

His face turned pale at her words. Not noticing that by the last sentence her eyes were back to some place a million miles a way in her mind. He watched as she laid back down and turned her back to him. She does blame me he thought sadly. He started to cover her up. And touched her shoulder.

"No leave me alone. Don't touch me." She began shrieking

_Oh god, she hates me_. He thought standing there helpless. As he watched her crawl off the bed into the corner of the room. Screaming wordlessly, the sound brought Hatori and Shigure running into her room.


	8. How Do I Deal?

-1**AN: okay same old same old. Reviews are good. I love knowing what people think good or bad.**

Chapter 8- "How do I deal with this pain?"

"What's wrong Yuki? What happened?" Shigure asked

"I don't know, she hates me" The rat said quietly and sadly. He stood in the hallway. And watched as Hatori talked to her trying to calm her down. He finally talked her out o of the corner. And had her sitting on the bed.

"Tohru, honey, clam down, your safe…We are here, me Hatori and Yuki. No one is going to hurt you?" Shigure said softly. Then putting his normal goofy grin on "You know what will make you feel better, tea, and as I treat I shall serve it to you in bed like the princess you are." He left the room. "Go in there, she needs us right now"

Yuki went in to the room and stayed by the door. "Are you okay Honda-san?" The girl nodded, still shaking. _I want to put my arms around her so bad or try to comfort her in some way_. He thought.

"Did you see the flowers he brought you?" Hatori said trying to keep her focused and grounded.

"Oh Yuki-kun they are so pretty" She said without her usual smile. "Why are you home so early?"

"I um was worried about you?"

"Oh, don't worry about me" She said trying to smile. "Hatori, I'm taking up to much of your time." She said in a shaky voice.

"No, its my job" He said watching her, she was trying to have a normal conversation. But her voice was shaky. "Are you hungry? You've not ate all day and its way past lunch time, we can order something out."

"Oh no I'll cook" She said and tried to stand. "Its my job" She stood and started walking to the door. It was obvious to the rat and dragon that each step was pain.

"Not today" Shigure said coming into the room with a tray. "you have the day off"

As if the short walk across the room had been more than she could handle. She sit in the floor. And started to rock and stare at the floor.

"It's the pain, even if in her mind she pretends it doesn't happen, the pain brings it back." Hatori explained. "Yuki get a cold cloth"

_I've never seen anything like this, she didn't seem to hate me, but was she pretending like Hatori said, just trying to make things normal,. _Her words from earlier still ringing in his ears. _Or was it me she was talking to? _He brought the cloth back . Tohru had her head down on her knees taking deep breathes All my fault Kept ringing in his ears…

"Thoru-kun I need you to stand up for me and come back to the bed, so you can eat and drink some tea." Hatori said wiping her face off.

She slowly got up like a sleep walker and walked to the bed. Shigure in a tight but cheerful voice explained that he had made this soup special and the tea was Ayas recipe. She took a drink and sighed. "Its good"

"Okay Tohru I'll be back later tonight, if you need anything get one of these guys to call me, I do need to get back to the office. Eat okay"

"Yuki?" She said from the bed. "did Kyo-kun go to school too?"

"Yes, Honda-san" _So even though I'm here its still him she wants. _"I'm going to take a walk"

"Yuki" Shigure said from the porch, the dog had followed him down the stairs. "She isn't trying to hurt you. She is more than a little confused right now. And Kyo was the first to reach her. Its not anything personal." _And there when she woke up._

"Whatever" The rat said sadly and started for the woods. _How do I deal with this kind of pain I'm feeling. It is almost as bad as those days that Akito kept me locked up._

Shigure watched Yuki walk into the woods.. I _wonder what is going to happen to our happy family. Sometime today I have to go see Akito, I defiantly don't want him coming here. Not until Thoru is a bit better_. His thoughts were interrupted by a crash from upstairs.

He ran up the stairs.

"I'm so sorry Shigure-san" Tohru said pitifully from her bed. " I don't know what came over me" The tray was thrown in the floor. Soup spilled the dish broken. "I broke your dish"

"Its okay. Did you at least finish your tea?" It had something in it to help relax her.

"Yes, it was delicious." She said. "I was trying to eat slowly because it is hard when every time I try to take a bite. I feel sick. Then it was like I could see that that man standing there and I could feel him…She started to cry.

"Hey Hey don't cry…Lay down and take some deep breaths like Hari told you to"

"How can you even look at me and stand to be around me." She asked sadly. "I'm no good anymore."

Shigure was at a loss for words. Saying yes you are just seemed weak. So he went to her bed and pulled her covers up. "Now no more talk like that" Fluffing up her pillow. Cracking a window. "Fresh air will help"

She closed her eyes. _Why am I so pathetic. This is all my fault. I'm so stupid. I should have waited in the changing room. I shouldn't have went back into the alley with him. Mom_ she thought, _I cant even get out of bed. I guess I've let you down too. _

"Shigure-san" She whispered from the bed, her voice heavy with sleep, "How do I deal with this type of pain.?"


	9. Shigure And Akito

-1**AN: Finally a new chapter. I love getting reviews and emails about my fan fiction, so keep em up L But if you do send me an email. Put the title in the subject, so I read it. I get a lot of junk mail.**

Chapter 9-Shigure and Akito

_I hate leaving the house, even if it is to see Akito. I know what this is about Hari warned me. I'll just have to smooth things over._ Shigure put his usual carefree expression on his face as he entered Akitos room.

"It's about time you got here, dog" Akito said, moving from the window. "You've been spending to much time with that girl." Trailing a finger down Shigures face.

"I'm sorry" The dog said not lifting his head.

"That UGLY girl!" Aktio screamed picking up a cup from the table throwing it in Shigures direction. It hit the wall near his head breaking and spilling the contents on the wall and the floor.

"Akito, don't make yourself sick." _Think Shigure, calm him down._ Akito let himself sink to the floor. The outburst had exhausted him. He had been ranting and raving about the girl since, Hatori, had left him this morning. Like a faithful dog, Shigure, took a seat beside his master. He started stroking, Akitos, silky black hair. "You know, no one means more to me than you do. Don't I come every time you call"

"You used to come to me even when I didn't call you" Akito, responded with an oily smile. "So what is wrong with this stupid girl?"

"She is sick."

Akito slapped him hard on the right side of his face. "I know that idiot. But there is more to this. Hatori was hiding something, now you are trying to also. Tell me the truth!" Slapping him on the left side of his face this time.

Controlling his anger, Shigure, put on his best scolded dog look. _This is all for you Akito, you are just to stupid to realize it._ "Dear, Akito, forgive me. I should know better than to try and hide things from you. You know me better than anyone."

Akito struck him again. "Idiotic dog. YOU are making me sick! Tell me the truth and tell me NOW. Or I may just have to pay a visit to your house."

Raising his eyes, he looked at Akito. "No need to get so upset. You know Tohru is clumsy, really clumsy. She took a huge tumble down the stairs at work. She broke her leg and is bruised up pretty bad." Shigure explained. "Hatori is worried about a concussion, that's why he wanted her in the hospital and is coming back and forth to the house."

Akito was silent staring into Shigure eyes. Trying to determine if he was lying. _This is a mess, my dog has never tried to hide things from me. The dog wouldn't hide things from me. He said this was all for me. If I find out he is lying I will kill this parasite in front of him._ "Shigure, you can leave and go back to playing nursemaid."

"I'll stay with you a little longer, master if you wish."

"I DO NOT WISH!" Akito said harshly. And watched Shigure walk to the door. "Oh dog, tell the girl. I hope she feels better. I'll come and see her to um pay my wishes when she feels up to moving around. I know how awful it is to have people visiting when you are to sick to move."

"We look forward to having you at our home." Shigure said in a slight more flippant tone than he had wanted to. He glanced back at Akito before closing the door, he had his head down on the table, his long blue kimono spread around him. _I won't let you hurt the girl, she is the key to the cure. You may not believe that but you didn't see Kyo last night with her. This is really for you._ He thought as he shut the door. _ I should go see Hari and tell him what I told Akito, hopefully I calmed him down enough for the time being._

"Hari, how wonderful to see you are still working" Shigure said in his typical goofy tone.

"Shigure, you've been to see Akito" Hatori said.

"Yep" he answered with a silly smile.

"Things went good then" shaking his head. _Why do you always have to act so happy. I can see the strain in your eyes old friend._ He tossed his pack of cigarettes over the desk to Shigure.

"I think, Aktio, believes me. I told him that Tohru is really clumsy, which isn't a lie, we all know that. I said that she took a tumble down the stairs, broke a leg and is banged up pretty bad. It seemed to satisfy him." The writer explained. _I hope._

"I suppose now I will have to answer to hi, explaining why I didn't tell him." Inhaling on his cigarette.

Shigure sit for a second smoking and staring at the desk. "Well, Hari, you are just to kind of a person to tell something so embarrassing on one of your patients." He watched as the doctor nodded and put out his cigarette. "I wish there was some way to see if Kyo is cured."

"I know, we can't push her though. I'm still not sure how she is going to start reacting once it really hits her. As far as we know though, there has been no other incidents of a zodiac member, holding another person like that. In the car she was basically in his lap and he had his arms around her. He should have changed." Hatori explained. "You didn't leave her alone did you?"

"Hari, I'm offended. Of course I didn't leave her alone." Shigure said putting his cigarette out. "I waited till Yuki got back form his walk. Yuki is with her."

"Yuki?" Hatori said. "How is he doing?" Remember the scene in Tohru's room earlier. _My heart goes out to Yuki, I know what it feels like to see someone you love hurting so much and there is nothing you can do to help them._

"He's hurting pretty bad right now. He thinks she blames him. I don't think its so much that she blames him as he is blaming himself. He said she keeps asking why he didn't pick her up? Where he was at stuff like that." Lighting another cigarette. "You know, Hatori, sometimes I think I'm to blame."

The doctor looked at his friend. "Shigure?"

"I could have went to get her when Yuki called me. Or sent Kyo there sooner. Or if I really want to get into blaming myself, I should have never convinced Akito, in the first place, to let her stay with us. I'm selfish, I just wanted to break the curse. But the longer she stayed and the more I watched her. They aren't the only two she has had a healing effect on. Look what she has done for Kisa, and even for us." The dog said sadly. "This is my fault. Isn't it Hari?"

"No this isn't your fault. I don't approve of you using her, like you were. I didn't want to see her hurt. But this couldn't have been prevented. Something's that happen really are just our destiny." Hatori said looking at his friend.

"Thank you Hari! You always no how to make me feel better." He said smiling. "Que sera, sera right?"

_You smile but your eyes tell the truth. _"I'll come by after Akito goes to bed to check on her. Make sure she eats something"

"So now you are throwing me out?" He asked with a fake-hurt face.

"Yes I have work to-do, and I don't want you leaving her to long with just one person watching her. In case they can't calm her down or something." The doctor explained rolling his eyes. "Tomorrow, I'll see if she can talk about it and tell me about it. It may help her. But we can't force it out of her. She may want to talk or she may not. If she wants to talk then its important that who ever is with her to just listen. In cases like this the victim, blames herself more than anyone else."

Shigure nodded. "Thank you Hari" he said before leaving. As he was leaving the main estate he looked back towards Akitos rooms. Aktio was sitting in his window, when he noticed Shigure he smirked and disappeared back into the room.


	10. Her Knight

-1**AN: Sorry for the delay in getting the new chapters up. I'll get back on schedule this week. Had a really really bad week. But anyway, I still don't own fruits baskets or its characters, just this story line :P There are some spoilers for the end of the anime and volume 6 of the magna vaguely mentioned in the chapter. So you have been warned.**

**Hope you all enjoy this chapter. So far its been on the favorite ones I've wrote, even though I feel sorry for Yuki.**

Chapter 10: Her knight.

Kyo was in a rush getting to get home, he wanted to see Tohru, needed to see her to make sure she was okay. _I shouldn't have went to the dojo, but I had to do something to burn off this anger._ He knew that the way he was going through his exercises had caused Kazuma to wonder. But right now he couldn't talk about what happened to her. Yuki was in the kitchen when he arrived home. He was trying to prepare some type of stew.

"What are you doing rat? Kyo hissed coming into the kitchen.

"What's it look like stupid cat?" Yuki replied. "I'm making Tohru some dinner, you can fix yourself something.." _I should tell him that she had been asking for him all day. But I can't it hurts to bad. Why is she asking for him, she knows that I love her. I wish she would just talk to me. _Finishing the stew, "Now get out of my way I can take it to her."

"I'll make her something to eat, everyone knows you can't cook." As Yuki pushed passed him. _I should trip him._ He thought vaguely . "How has she been today?" Yuki ignored him and started up the stairs.

"I'm talking to you,. Damnit rat answer me!" He was starting to get mad and under normal circumstances he would have started a fight with Yuki. But right now all he wanted to know was how Tohru was.

"Yuki?" They both heard her call from her room. They both froze her voice sounded terrified.

"I don't have time for this, I've got to get to her." He hurried up the stairs. _I hope she isn't having another flashback.._

"Well I'm coming too!" he heard Kyo say from the bottom of the stairs. _Like you need my permission._

"Tohru-san. Its okay, you're not alone", Yuki said entering the room. "Hatori said that you needed to eat something. I um I made this for you."

She was sitting up in the bed. And looked down at the tray that Yuki had made. The stew smelt good. She took one bite and groaned. "I'm not hungry". _I know I should eat, I'm hungry and Yuki went through all this trouble but every time I try to eat I just feel sick.. _She noticed Kyo standing near the door. "Kyo -kun" the despair lifted from her face for a moment. "You're home, I was starting to worry."

Yuki's face feel. He knew that he needed to deal with this, but it was so hard to watch the girl he loved, fall for someone else. That through took him by surprise. Tohru falling in love with Kyo. He moved the tray from her and sat it on the desk. "I'll leave it here in case you change your mind." Instead of leaving he stayed near the desk looking out the window.

"Hey, course I'm home, I only went to school and the dojo" Kyo said his face blushing slightly. She had always welcomed him home happily but there was something about the way her face lit up tonight, especially after all that had happened. "How are you feeling?"

She looked down. "I don't know." She mumbled and took her hair brush off the night table. She began trying to brush it.

"You don't know? How can you not…"His sentence dropped off as he took a closer look at her. The cuts on her face were covered in small band-aids, the swelling as well as most the redness had went away. But left, deep blue-black bruises.

"I can't even brush my own hair, my body hurts so bad." She said angrily and threw the brush across the room. It slammed against the wall. "Everything hurts." Both boys were stunned by the out burst. They had never seen Tohru angry before and didn't realize that she was capable for such a fit.

"Thoru-san." Yuki said quietly picking up the brush and putting it on the night table.

"What?" She snapped. He looked away, he wasn't sure how to handle this Tohru. "What YUKI can't you even look at me NOW?"She wailed.

Yuki looked at her for a second her eyes shine with a pain and hurt he had no idea how to even begin to heal. "Its not that. I just I um I" He stammered out. Looking back down. "I'm going to you some more medicine." Even he knew it was an awful thing to say. _I might as well just tell her to erase her memories next._

"I don't want any more medicine." Hitting the fluffy comforter with a small fist. "I want to…I want to be…I want you to." The tears began to fall and she felt helpless again. "Just go."

"Tohru-kun." He said approaching the bed. He reached out for her hand. He stopped short, though looking at it. The nails were broken, but clean and there were fingerprint-shaped bruises around her wrist.

"I said just go." She said in such a low tone, it almost sounded like a growl. He looked at her, her eyes glared at him in a way he never imagined possible for her. His face went white as he stood up. He pushed past Kyo who was standing in a shocked silence.

Kyo walked over to the bed and sit on the corner of it silently for several minutes. _I know how she feels. She wants someone to see her, for her, now. To look at her and see the pain._ "Tohru?" He said taking her hand, her body was shaking. "Tohru?" He said again, brushing her hair back from her face, his hand shaking as he looked closely at her bruised face.

"How can you look at me?" She asked harshly. "Yuki cant and he said he told me that.."

"Forget Yuki." Kyo said angrily "He is just a stupid rat." He leaned over and got the hair brush off the night table and began to brush her hair. _What has gotten into me?_ "I can look at you because I…I can look at you because you have always been there for me." _You were by my side when I changed. You held me then, now I'll hold you._. He continued brushing her long brown hair gently.

She closed her eyes and almost sighed as Kyo began to brush her hair. That had been something her mom would do for her, when she would be really upset. And someone brushing her hair had always calmed her down. When he reached her lower back, she fought the urge to cringe though. _Its just Kyo. Kyo who found her. Kyo who had saved her. Kyo who had held her. Kyo who wiped her tears away this morning. Yuki, I don't hate you. I don't even think I blame you, I just want to know why you were so late. I want you to look at me and see me. I don't want you to turn and run when I lash at. Am I that ugly now. Do you hate me. I don't even know what I'm feeling anymore. I just know that you said you loved Yuki, now you can't even look at me._ "Kyo? When you look at me now what do you see?" She opened her eyes and meet his orange eyes, in the mirror, ignoring her own reflection.

"I see you. You are very confused and hurt by all this. I see you though and this thing that happened to you. Doesn't change that fact that you are you." He answered

"Doesn't it though." Turning to face him. Her brown eyes desperately searching his face.

"No it doesn't.. To me, Thoru you are still the same sweet kind hearted girl." Looking into her eyes. "that followed me out into the rain, even though she was terrified. The same girl who forced herself to see my true form and really see it. The same one who held on to me even after I hit her. The same one who begged me to come home that night so we could just be together. Tohru, in my eyes this hasn't changed you." Putting his arm around her. "You are still beautiful to me"

"But Kyo, I'm dirty now." She began to cry.

He pulled her into an embrace holding her tight. "Not to me, not ever." He whispered in her ear. "I love you." He said as she cried. They stayed that way for several minutes. Before the thought dawned on them. Kyo hadn't transformed, something had happened and the curse, on him was broken. He released her as she gasp and kissed her forehead.

"Kyo? Will you finish brushing my hair." She asked quietly and turned around. HE began brushing it again. _oh Kyo I wish I could say I love you back, because I do. But I just can't not right now, I don't know if I ever can. If I can trust someone again. _"Kyo-kun you saved me again, tonight you know that? You're like a knight in shining armor."

Kyo snorted in reply and finished brushing her hair._ Its okay for you not to tell me right now Tohru, I understand._


	11. Kyo's Beads

-1**AN: Thank you all so much for the reviews. I really appreciate them and they let me know what I'm doing right and wrong. Enjoy this chapter, Tohru isn't in it much but it really changes things for the Sohma's.**

Chapter 11: Kyos Beads

"Kyo, can you come to the library a second." Shigure said after a few hours, when he was sure that Tohru was asleep. Kyo had been sitting the desk chair with his feet propped up against the bed, reading. He nodded his head, glanced at Tohru and went to the library where hew as be met by Hatori and Yuki.

Hatori solemnly put out his cigarette. "Kyo, we need to talk to you?"

Yuki looked away. "Do I really have to be here for this?" He mumbled.

Kyo searched the faces of his cousins, confused he sat cross legged o n the floor. "So talk"

"Kyo," Shigure, began unusually serious. "I saw you hugging Tohru."

"SO?" the cat said defensively looking up. "She was crying."

"You didn't change. "Shigure continued take a seat beside the cat on the floor and placed his hand on kyos shoulder.

Scooting over Kyo said. "I know" _There is something more this, they are all to quiet._ He began to watch the others closely.

"What Shigure, is trying to say is that we think your curse has been lifted." Hatori began and he to got into the floor with Kyo, on his other side. "But we need to be sure. Kyo, we need you to remove your beads."

The other Sohma's watched as Kyo's face went through a series of emotions, before settling on anger. "No, HELL NO!" Kyo said, jumping up knocking his two older cousins away. This had crossed his mind, but he hadn't be able to bring himself to try it. "Not yet. Not now."

"Why not?" Hatori asked standing, tightening his shirt and pants. Shigure stood to quietly watching, he gave Yuki a slight nod. The rat looked away.

"Tohru, she needs me." Kyo answered softly. "And every time I take that for, its harder, I'm …" He dropped off looking in Yuki's direction. He couldn't admit that, not in front of Yuki. He couldn't admit that every time he took on his true form, it was harder and harder to change back and he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to take his human form back. But never admit your fear to an enemy. "No, Hatori. Not right now." He said firmly.

The rat was study the books on Shigure's shelf as if they had suddenly become very interesting. _For once I actually feel sorry for him. For once I don't want to torment him, but it's the only way._ He silver eyes shone with resolution as he turned to the orange haired boy. "Why not you stupid car? Are you afraid?" He took his place, in front of Kyo, not wanting to look him in the eye, but knew that he had to. _I'm not sure which I want more, Kyo to change and for Tohru to see it, for her to reject him as harshly has she has me. Or for the curse to be lifted, even though if it is lifted, Kyo wouldn't have to go into confinement, but there would be a chance for the rest of them._

"What did you say, rat?" Kyo, said instantly angry. _Think don't do this, there was a reason they are all here and I'm virtually surrounded_.

"I said, are you scared? Now are you deaf as well fraidy cat?" Yuki said watching Kyos orange eyes flare.

"Fuck you" Kyo said landing a solid kick to Yuki's left side.

Hatori and Shigure stood off to the sides, watching the boys fight. Yuki had strict instructions to tire Kyo out to ware him down._ This could take a while. Tohru could wake up. Then what? _Shigure thought. "Hari?" He whispered and through a series of hand gestures, he conveyed to the doctor what he wanted to day, he waited for Hari to agree with him.

"Yuki that enough" Hatori moved over placing his hands on Yuki's shoulder. Shigure was busy trying to hold Kyo still. "KYO!" he said sternly "This must be done, NOW" _I'm sorry._ In a flash he moved forward and yanked the bead off Kyo's wrist. Kyo gasped and looked at the doctor, his face went pale, his eyes full of hurt and fear. _I'm sorry Kyo, I'm so sorry. _He thought as he watched Kyo collapse on the floor on all fours, when Shigure released him. The stood over him watching as he shook and panted. Shigure looked at Hatori with a question in his eyes. Hatori answered by holding his hands up. Yuki let a breath out he didn't know he was holding. His eyes widen and he looked towards the doctor as he heard a low moan come from Kyo.

_Why did they do this to me. _Kyo thought as he tried to steady himself and control his breathing. He was shaking and had broken out into a cold sweat, he could almost feel the cats true form coming. _Any second, and its over. I'm sorry Tohru I can't I'm sorry._ He moaned loudly as he started to get dizzy, he felt like lunch was coming back up. _I really do love you, Tohru_.

"Kyo?" The dragon said kneeling by the boy, once he was sure he wouldn't transform. "Kyo, you didn't change your curse."

Shigure was fairly dancing around the library. He was smiling widely. "Guess we can't call you the cat, any more, Kyo-kun" This was good news, wonderful news, this was hope. _How did the curse break and did it break for all of us, or just Kyo_.

Kyo rolled over, starring at the ceiling. _The curse is gone, I'm cured. I'm free._ "How could you? With Tohru right there? And the shape she is in? If I had?" He got up abruptly giving them a look that would have killed he stalked out of the room and stormed down the hall.

"What?" Shigure asked. "If that was me I would be happy, not all prissy."

"Do you really not get it. If he had changed and Tohru had seen him, even though she has seen it before. In her condition though, it could have caused some complications. And in the end would have hurt them both, maybe beyond repair. Hatori explained.

"But he didn't…And this whole mess could have been avoided if he had just taken it off." Shigure insisted.

"But he didn't want to we took his choice away." _We are no better than the one who hurt Tohru. _Hatori thought.

"How did his curse get lifted?" Shigure asked cocking his head.

"Don't you see Shigure?" The rat said softly, he had been quietly letting it all sink in. He lifted his head, the tears he tried to hold back began to fall silently as he spoke. "Its their love, that broke the spell. He loved her more than himself, he wasn't selfish for at least one moment and was thinking of her and not the curse. He loved her more than himself and it broke. He though of her first." The rat finished by slamming his hand through the table and walked out. _I couldn't think of her first, I put myself first, I couldn't take her into my arms because I was scared of transforming. Even that night I told her I loved her. I held her away from me when we kissed, if I had just._

_My table._ Shigure thought as he looked to Hatori, to see if the dragon could make any sense of this.

Hatori seemed lost in thought as he stared at Kyo's beads. _Kana, I loved her more than anything. But did I put her first. No I always held a part of me back, even after she found out. _"He maybe right." He said clearing his throat. "If Tohru wakes up tell her I'll be back in the morning. I don't want to wake her. "

"Hari?" Shigure said

"No, shigure I need to be alone." He laid the beads down on the desk and started gathering his belongings.

Shigure sat and watched as his friend left. _He must be thinking of Kana_. _The curse is broke. I knew it could be broke. I hate that it took this all this and Tohru getting hurt, for us to find it out. But I knew that if it was going to be broke she would be the key. Now to just find out if Yuki was right. I wonder what I should do with these beads. _He sighed and laid them on his desk. HE got up and started towards his room. He looked in on Tohru. Kyo was in the floor beside her bed, his eyes closed but he didn't seem to be asleep. Shigure started into the room.

Kyo jumped up standing in front of the bed. "Oh its just you. What do you want, dog?"

"I was just checking on Tohru, Kyo really." Shigure answered in a whisper. _His love for her._ Yuki's words echoed in his ears as he watched Kyo sit back down in the floor after straightening the blankets and moving some hair out of her face. Shigure in a unusual moment of paternal feelings, left the room and went to the cats room, _no he isn't the cat any longer_ he reminded himself, and gathered up a couple of blankets and pillows and took them back to Kyo. "Here?" He sit them in the floor beside the boy.

Kyo had his back up against the bed and was staring at his wrist. _I feel like I'm missing something._ He looked up in surprise as Shigure handed him the blankets. "Shigure? Where are my beads?"

"In the library, but you don't need them now."

"I know I just feel funny without them." Kyo said standing. Tohru let out a small cry in her sleep. He immediately put his hand on her forehead.

"You stay with her. I'll get them" Shigure said._ Stay with her forever Kyo, she may have just saved us all. Stay with your love, and don't give her up._ He got the beads and brought them back to Kyo. Without a word he handed them to him. He thought he heard Kyo mumble a thanks. When he got to the door, he looked back in time to see Kyo kiss her softly on the lips and whisper "I love you". Before he spread his blankets out and laid down.

_I can have a normal life now. _Kyo thought as he laid there and drifted off to sleep.


	12. Yuki and Tohru

-1**AN: Sorry that I didn't have this chapter up Tuesday. Having a rough week. Before we get to the next chapter I want to personally thank the ones that have review, commented and help me improve this story. Daelayni, Nari-Chan 13, I Know Your Name, Fruits Basket Girl 911, NatsumiSato, Kikyomusdie, Serinity'sAngel, Gothbird777, ItsADorkThing. Thank you all. **

**I was feel a bit sorry for Yuki myself, so this chapter makes myself feel better. Poor Tohru doesn't know how she is feeling, at all right now, and its hard for her to reach out to everyone and make everyone feel like she used to. So she tends to cling to one person, Kyo in this case. **

Chapter 12 Yuki and Tohru.

Tohru lay there tossing and turning. She looked at the clock 3:40AM the red lights told her. It hadn't moved much since the last time she had looked at it._ The medicine wore off, and I can't find it, guess Shigure took it to his room, or Hatori didn't leave any. _ She finally flopped over to her back, trying to take deep breaths and keep control of her self. She lay there staring up at the ceiling listening to Kyo's soft breathing, from the floor. _Mom, what did I do to deserve this? All I'm doing is causing more pain for everyone involved, especially Yuki, why have I been so mean to him. I'm so thankful for Kyo, with out right now I'd probably lose my mind, he keeps me here. But Mom, why? I've tried to be a good person I've always tried to do the right thing. I've never hurt anyone on purpose. So why MOM WHY? Why would anyone want to hurt me like this. Why would someone do this to me?_ But tonight there was no comfort from her mother. There was no comfort, at all. Always before she had been able to comfort herself, and now, tonight she wasn't able to. She felt so alone, more alone staring at the ceiling and clock than she had ever felt in her life. She wanted to cry, her chest was empty and hollow. _I can't cry anymore I've cried them all out. _ She turned back and looked at the clock, 3:46AM. _Maybe I should fix myself some tea. _

She crawled to the bottom of the bed and scooted off not wanting to disturb Kyo. When she got to the door and looked down the hall. _At least it doesn't hurt to walk so bad anymore. _There were no lights on except for the dim light coming under the door from her bathroom and the house was quiet. _I guess everyone is asleep._ The stairs were pitch dark though and she figured the downstairs would be the same thing. She looked back at Kyo, and briefly thought of waking him and having him come with her. He was lying curled on his side, his arms thrown over his head, partially blocking the light that she had to sleep with on. His orange hair was laying across the pillow, his lower lip stuck slightly out. _He looks a lot younger when he sleeps, I can't wake him up, he has to be tired too. I need to let him sleep. This is stupid I've walked these halls a million times, this is my home. I can do this._

She took a deep breath and hurried to the kitchen, immediately hitting the light switch, flooding the room with a bright white light. She let out her breath and sighed with relief. Taking a few deep breathes to bring her pulse back to normal.She glanced around the kitchen and smiled slightly. The room was already a mess, dishes were piled in the sink, the garbage was piled by the door, and left-overs from take out places where left out on the counter. _It almost looks as bad as it did when I first moved in, I am useful, I guess. _ She put the kettle on the stove and began to heat it, sitting down at the table for a few minutes. She felt restless, _ I just can't sit here, I am sick of thinking. _She began to straighten the kitchen.

Yuki, looked out of his bedroom door, when he heard soft footsteps in the hall. He was surprised to see Tohru hurrying down the stairs alone. He glanced back towards her room. No sign of Kyo. _Should I follow her? Would she even want to see me? _The rat wondered. Hatori's words from earlier this evening came back to him: _She doesn't hate you Yuki. There are really no set predictions to how this type of thing will affect someone. Before she gets better, she could get worse. Or she could wake up one day like nothing has happened and carry on like that for months. There's no way of knowing. She is feeling guilty and ashamed now, I have gotten her to tell me that much. Her feelings are really confused right now. The important thing to remember is to be there for her:. _ He nodded his head as if agreeing and looked back towards her room, Kyo still hadn't came out yet, so he headed down the stairs. She was doing dishes when he entered the kitchen. _What is she doing washing dishes at this hour?_

"Tohru-san?" Putting his hand on her shoulder. This action caused her to jump, tense up and drop the bowl she was drying as she spun around. "It's just me." His voice sounded loud in the tense air of the quiet kitchen. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"Why did you sneak up behind me? Don't do that?" She cried out steadying her hands on the counter. She took a deep breath. _This is Yuki, calm down._ "Yuki-kun, I broke the bowl." She said quietly.

"Its okay" He answered seeing her distress. She was wearing her pajamas and an old robe. Her hair was matted from laying in bed all day. Her face was pale but her eyes were bloodshot and very dark underneath, there was no light coming form those brown eyes not tonight. Her small body, shook slightly. "Sit down, I'll clean it up." He said as he began to pick yup the pieces. _Say something don't just come down here and scare her say something. _"What are you doing up?" _That's great, genius. _

"I couldn't sleep anymore. The medicine wore off. And I tried to sleep but I don't want to close my eyes right now." Her voice trembling as she looked down at the table.

"Do you want some company?" He asked quietly. Standing near the table. When she didn't answer, he sat across from her. A couple of times he thought she was going to say something but she would shake her head and look back down at the table. The kettle whistled loudly causing her to jump. "I'll fix it for you." He heard her sigh as he began preparing the tea. He set her cup in front of her. Watching her wrap her hands around the warm cup, she inhaled the steam.

"Thank you Yuki-kun." Trying to smile. _I need to be nicer to him. He won't look at me in the face, he probably thinks that I'm broken and damaged. And he is right. But he is still Yuki. And he is trying to night, I need to try to. But I wish he would look at me._

"Tohru-kun, the other night." Yuki began. "I'm sorry," taking a drink of tea, "I should have been there to pick you up, or called you at work and told you to wait inside. I'm sorry." He said simply looking out the window. _If I look at her, in her eyes, I might see blame or hate. I don't want her to blame me. _

"Where were you?" She asked quietly.

"I was still at the school, we were having to go over some plans for the class trip. I didn't think anything like this would have happened. I'm so stupid. If I had known I would have been there." He answered, thinking to himself the excuses though true sounded weak. They sat quietly for several minutes. Sipping the tea neither looking at each other.

"I know you would have protected me, if you had been there." She said rising from the table. " I'm going to finish the dishes." _I know you wouldn't have let anyone hurt more. You cared about me as much as Kyo does._ "I'm sorry too Yuki-san." She said as she began to put the dried dishes away.

"For what?" Looking up quickly his silver hair falling into his eyes. _What on earth does she have to be sorry for. _

"For everything." Was her answer, confusing the rat even more. But he was happy she was at least talking to him. He began to clear off the counters, throwing away several boxes of unidentifiable food. He watched her start wiping the counters and table at an almost maniac pace.

"I'm sorry too, Tohru-kun." He said gathering up the garbage in a new bag.

"I know, but you have nothing to be sorry for." She turned and looked at him. "I'm not mad at you Yuki-kun, not really and I don't hate you." She faltered, her lip began the trembling. "I just don't know what's going on. One minute I just want to cry, the next minute I want to scream. Sometimes my chest hurts so bad I can't breathe. One minute I want everyone to hug me, but then I get sick at the thought of people touching me. So I pull away. Kyo understands, I don't know if you do. I don't, I don't know how he does. I don't even know what I'm feeling anymore, or what I'm suppose to be feeling." She sank her knees in the floor leaning against the cabinet. "I wish he had just killed me." Dropping her head to her knees. "I hate myself, this wasn't your fault, or Kyo's or Shigure-sans. This was my fault."

Yuki walked over to where she was sitting, and knelt down beside her putting his hand on her shoulder. She was shaking. He didn't know what to say to make her feel better, but he had to try. "I'm glad he didn't kill you, Tohru. I would die if you were dead." She looked up at him, he kissed the top of her head. He hesitated a moment _is the curse lifted for us all or just Kyo? _He pulled her into an embrace.

Poof He was sitting beside her in rat form. _I guess it was just Kyo._

"Yuki-kun, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have hugged you." She said picking up his small form in the palm of her hand.

"Don't be I just want us to stay friends." He said. She tried to smile again, but it died before reaching her eyes. _I wonder if she will ever be able to smile like she used to._ "You should go back to bed, you still need your rest." She nodded and sit him down.

"Thank you Yuki-kun." she said. He watched her leave the room.

poof He changed back. _Why didn't it lift. I love her as much as that c..Kyo does. If not more, I loved her first. I've never hurt her, he has struck her before. I love her, so why isn't it enough._

**AN: Okay, I feel better about myself now. Because I'm not a Yuki hater. In fact, there isn't a single character in this series that I don't like. I even like Akito. LOL…Anyway I will try to have another chapter up on Saturday, but it depends on how my life is going. Reviews are good, and very much appreciated. Thanks again everyone.**


	13. Tohrus Hair

-1**AN: I got to do the update in time. And to answer the question I've been emailed a few times. Yes, I've been through something similar, back this summer. I'm basing Tohru's reaction on the reactions and feelings I've had.**

**Thank you all for the reviews. Keep on reading.**

Chapter 13: Tohru's Hair

The next few days passed slowly for Tohru, as the minutes went into hours and hours into days. She just seemed to watch them slip by. The nights were the worst though, it seemed like the medicine Hatori gave her didn't last long enough. When it wore off she would spend hours tossing and turning or wake up shaking in a cold sweat.

Yuki continued to bring her small gifts of flowers and candy in hopes of cheering her up. She didn't yell at him any longer and was nice, but she would hardly speak to him and she never looked at him. When she ran into him in the house, she would try to force a smile, but it was obvious to him she was slipping away. Kyo had also noticed a change in Tohru . He still slept by her bed every night and tried to spend as much time with her as he could. He wanted to tell her that his curse was gone, but he didn't feel that right now was the time he just wanted to focus on her getting better. Several times he had caught her brushing out her hair and crying, but when she noticed him she would give him a sad smile and leave the room. She was talking less and less to everyone in the house, even him.

"Shigure, how has Tohru been doing?" Hatori asked one evening after seeing her.

"In some ways she seems better." The dog answered sipping his tea. He stared off into the distance, the sun was setting and the air was getting cooler, you could smell fall arriving. "She cooked dinner for us the other night."

"But?" The doctor probed.

"But she seems different." Lighting a cigarette and inhaling deeply. "She seems like she is leaving us, her body is her, but her spirit isn't." Hatori nodded, watching his friend, as Shigure cocked his head to the side, a motion that suggested he was in deep thought. He looked at Hatori with sad brown eyes. "There's no light to her anymore. She tries to smile but her eyes are dull, she is even pulling away from Kyo-kun." He crushed out his cigarette. She has already lost weight and I've not seen her eat a whole meal since this. She showers and puts back on her pajamas." He took another sip of tea and sighed. "She has also asked me to let her keep the sleeping pills in her room. I'm worried about her, Hari."

Hatori studied the writer closely, this wasn't like his friend to admit that he was worried about anything, especially someone other than himself. He had noticed all of what Shigure had described, most of it was to be expected. When he went into see her this afternoon she was brushing her hair, he heard her whisper. " Why does brushing my hair, or touching my hair make me feel so sick?"

(((FLASHBACK TO THIS AFTERNOON)))

"Hatori-san." She said wiping her eyes, when she heard him clear his throat. She gave him a fake smile. "I feel bad that you have to come out here and see me everyday, you must be very busy."

"Its no problem, Tohru-san, I just want to make sure you are okay." He said looking at her closely. Her bruises were fading to a yellow-greenish tint, and most the scratches had scabbed over.

"You said everything was um..healing fine." She gave him a sad smile. Her eyes tired.

"How are you feeling, I'm not talking psychically. Are you eating and sleeping okay?" The doctor asked.

She sighed deeply. _I wish I was dead or could just sleep forever, without dreams._ "I wish I could sleep better, Hatori-san. The pills you gave me work good, but they don't last all night. Couldn't you tell Shigure-san to let me keep them in my room." She said pleading with her eyes.

He looked at her closely. "I'll up the dose a bit, but Tohru-kun, I want to Shigure to keep them just a bit longer okay." He said scruffy her hair lightly. She trembled under his touch.

(((END FLASHBACK)))

He nodded to Shigure. "I want you to keep the bottle with you at all times. But at night leave her ½ a pill, in case she needs it. She does need the rest."

"Hari, I've told Aye, about what , what happened." Shigure said helping himself to one of the dragons cigarette. "He has agreed to help me."

"Help you with what, what do you plan on doing?" Hatori asked leaning up to get a closer look at Shigure. Shigure's eyes had darkened, and he was almost snarling.

"I've found the bastard." He growled. "I know who did this. Other than that, Hatori, you probably don't want to know."

Hatori nodded, his friend was right he didn't need to know anymore, shaking off a cold shiver. "I should probably be going. Akito, is still throwing a fit." They walked in silence to Hatori's car, Shigure opened his door for him. Before he got into the car he told Shigure, "keep an eye on her, Shigure, and be careful."

Kyo was sitting on her bed watching her. _She is moving like a zombie. She turned down Yuki's offer to help her with her make-up work. Would me telling her make her feel any better?_

"Kyo-kun?" She said when she caught him staring at her. "Are you okay?"

He gave her a smile. "I'm fine, do you need anything."

She shook her head no. "You know, Kyo-kun?" She said, running her fingers nervously through her long brown hair. "You don't have to sleep in here every night. I'm a big girl, I can stay by myself." Giving him a tight smile.

He looked at her startled. "I don't mind staying." He answered and moved closer to her. Pushing some hair back from her face.

She jerked and jumped off the bed. "I need to take a shower." She hurried out of the room. She closed the bathroom door. _I'm sorry Kyo-kun, I don't want to make myself a burden on you._ For several minutes she stood in front of the mirror. She began to brush her hair. _You always told me I had pretty hair mom. ' Tohru, brush your hair 100 strokes a night.' _Her moms voice said in the back of her mind, as she ran the brush through her long strands. She began to shake, it came back to her, his voice, "Your hair is so pretty." She shivered and turned pale as she felt his hand stroke her hair. Her breathing became faster as she watched her self in the mirror. _My hair, he told me my hair was pretty._ She began to look through the drawer of her sink._ I'm sorry, mom._ She thought as she found an old pair of scissors. She was trembling, but not crying as she grabbed a handful of hair and began to cut. As she watched herself in the mirror, cutting away at her hair, her tears began to fall silently, running off her chin onto the sink. Loose strands fell and collected on the floor beside her and behind her. She didn't stop cutting until she could no longer feel it touching her shoulders._ Now he won't think I'm pretty. He won't hurt me again. _ Her eyes dropped to the floor, the silent tears began to grow into sobs. _ My hair, I hadn't cut it since Mom died. _ Exhausted she sank to her knees and began to wail.

The sound of her anguished crying brought all three men to the bathroom. Kyo arrived first and stopped short at the sight of her kneeling in the floor with her hair jagged and strands of it laying in the floor. He moved to her.

"Tohru-kun?" He whispered. She didn't look up. He hadn't noticed Yuki enter the room, the rat's face pale at the sight of her.

"Tohru-san?" Yuki said standing over her and Kyo.

From behind him Shigure came up. "What's wrong?" Yuki moved over, so he could see. The sight of his flower, huddle in the floor clutching her hair and rocking was almost to much for the writer to take.

"Tohru?" Kyo repeated, when she didn't look up. "Did you hurt yourself?" Seeing the scissors laying on the counter.

She looked up at him sadly. "Kyo-kun?" her brown eyes searching his orange ones, "my hair." She said simply holding some of the loose strands out for him to see.

"I know baby." He whispered. "Why did you do this?" Taking the hair from her and throwing it into the sink. He watched as she inhaled and exhaled shakily several times. She looked around the bathroom and tried to stand up. Kyo helped her keeping his arm around her waist.

"He the guy who he." She started to cry again. "he said my hair was so pretty. Now its not. Now he won't want to hurt me again." The men were silent and they each looked at each other, what could be said to that.

"He won't hurt you anymore Tohru-kun." Shigure said.

Kyo began to brush the short strands out of her wash and wipe her face off with a wash cloth that had been laying on the sink. He gave her a small smile, when she looked at him.

"I'm ugly, now?" she whispered.

Kyo's heart felt like it had been ripped out when she said that., to him there was no way she could ever be ugly. "Never." He pulled her close into his arms.

She relaxed against him, breathing in his familiar scent. Then it struck her. _Kyo-kun isn't changing. The other night as soon as Yuki hugged me he changed. _ Her eyes widened. "Kyo? You aren't changing."

"I know" he said kissing the top of her head. He felt her stiffen against him, he just held her tighter giving her a slight squeeze. _I wish I could take your pain away._

"Here Tohru." Shigure said from the door. "I want you to take this and let Kyo help you to bed."

"But the mess…" She began

The writer, gave her a bright smile and waved his hand. "Yuki will take care of it, I'll get you some tea ready and bring it to you in a minute."

"Yuki?" She looked at him.

"Its fine, Tohru-kun, you rest." He said giving her a smile.

"Come on" Kyo said leading her out of the room.

Yuki began sweeping up the floor. _I can't believe she did this to herself. Her hair._

Kyo sat on the bed with her, neither talking. She leaned up against him and waited for the pill to take effect. _Kyo is better now, he isn't cursed. I've waited so long for this. But what about the others Yuki is still cursed. How did this happen? I wish I had the energy and the strength to figure this out. But now Kyo can have a normal relationship. I can't hold on to him, I have to let him go. I can't be normal, I'm not normal anymore._ She drifted off to sleep with Kyo holding her. He watched as her breathing eased and stroked her hair softly, it was cut uneven and ragged, but to him she still looked beautiful.

"I love you so much." Kyo whispered. He pulled a blanket up over her and began to get up. Her arms tightened around him.

"Don't leave me, I don't want you to go" She whispered in her sleep.

**AN: Not sure how that chapter turned out. I've been exhausted this week. Trying to get a bunch of stuff done. I may have to cut down to one chapter a week for a while. **


	14. Shigures Revenge

-1**AN: In my next chapter I will personally thank all my new reviewers. I meant to do it in this one but forgot to get the names. Things will be much easier for me when I finally get around to get my net back at home. Anyway thanks to everyone who has helped me out so far. I really REALLY enjoyed writing this chapter. eh maybe wishful thinking. Oh and this chapter does contian some harsh language.**

**To anyone out there who has been through something similar, or may face it in the future, remember you are not alone.**

**On to the story….**

Chapter 14: Shigure's Revenge

"Aya?" Shigure said in the phone quietly. "I've thought about it and I want to go through with it, especially after what happened here tonight."

"Gure-chan, what happened?" his friend asked him there was only one other time Aayme had heard the dogs voice sound like this, the night that Akito hurt Hatori's eye.

"Tohru cut, she cut.." Breathing deeply, "she cut off her hair. We have to get this bastard. Aya, you've not seen her, she's."

"Okay okay I'm coming over. We'll talk a bit more, don't do anything without me there with you. Gure?" Aya paused. "Is she okay now?"

"For now, she is resting, Kyo is with her."

"Have you call Hari?"

"No, not yet, he had just left here anyway."

Aayme, hung the phone up and looked through his costumes quickly deciding on a long pink and gold kimono. Tohru had slowly grown on all the Sohmas, save for Akito. He wondered briefly if even Shigure had not came to love Thoru, not in the way that Kyo or Yuki did. But he defiantly felt something for her. _Just wait on me to get there. Don't do something stupid, Gure , we have a plan remember?_

"Shigure?" Aya said loudly as he entered the house.

"What are you doing here nii-san?" Yuki asked glaring as he came down the stairs. "Tohru is sick, keep it down."

"Yuki, Aya, is here to see me." Shigure said from the top of the stairs.

"Excuse me my dear little brother. I will make a special visit to come see you. And you alone, soon. " The snake said in his typical flamboyant manor. "But to night my Gure needs me."

The rat just shook his head as he went on into the kitchen. _I'm not going to even try to understand them._

As two of the Mabudachi Trio entered Shigures room. "Aya, you really don't have to get involved with this, if you don't want to. Akito, I am worried about the…"

"Don't worry." Kissing Shigure lightly. "I've told you before, I will always be here for you. You just tell me what you need me to-do. "

Shigure smiled at his friend. "If you can find a seat. Take it." Smiling lightly at the mess in his room. _Tohru is always asking me if I want her to clean it, but I think even a slave would revolt on cleaning up this mess_. He thought throwing some blankets off the bed and sitting down. The two began to go over the details of the plan.

An hour later they were ready to leave. Before leaving the house though they stopped by Tohru's room, to tell Kyo to keep an extremely close eye on her. Shigure was worried that next time it would be just her hair she cut. The girls room was dimly lit by an angel night light, that Yuki had brought home for her the other day. '_It might make it easier for her to sleep better, if the lights aren't as bright.'_ The rats explanation came back to the dog. He titled his head slightly as the breeze came lightly through the room, he could smell the end of summer nearing. Tohru was currently laying on her side curled close to and facing Kyo, who was sprawled on his back.

"He must have fallen asleep while calming her down. Kyo has really surprised me." Shigure whispered looking at the sleeping teens. As if sensing a presence in the room, without waking Kyo turned to his side, putting a protective arm around Tohru. They watched the girl grimace in her sleep until she took a deep breath, _perhaps breathing in Kyos scent_, and relax against Kyo, huddling closer to him.

_Even in his sleep he is protecting her, both Gure and Hari had said how protective of the girl, Kyo had become I had no idea though._ Aya thought,. _Yes this guy should pay, she should be worrying about what dress to wear to the formal, and which boy to choose, not all this. She was just to innocent. _"Lets go Gure." He said in an unusual quiet voice.

Yuki looked up from the porch steps as he heard the front doors slide open. "Where are you two going? Nii-san what on earth are you wearing?" Gaping at his older brother as he saw him dressed similar to a woman, _or Ritchan_, with his long pink kimono he had his silver hair pulled back loosely with a few strands falling free into his face.

Aayame responded by sashaying across the porch and doing a cat walk turn before saying. "All part of the plan."

"What plan?" Yuki said getting more confused by the second. _Do I really want to know?_

"Yuki, there are something's I have to do tonight. Here is Tohru's medicine if she wakes up or Kyo looks for it, just give her half of one. I should be home before morning." handing his younger cousin the bottle of pills.

"Shall we?" Aya asked Shigure linking his arm through Shigure's.

"This is the bar I met him at a few nights ago, and we are suppose to meet here tonight. You know what to do?"

"Of course" Aya said with his usual confidence, giving his friend a wink. He entered the bar, swinging his hips and hair as he made his way through the bar. He wanted to get noticed and was getting several looks and a few whistles from the drunken barflies. The snake smiled slightly as he took a seat at a table in the middle of the dimly lit, smoke filled place. He glance behind him and nodded slightly at a man sitting in the corner. He watched the mans leer grow as he raised his glass. Aya looked away quickly. _That's the bastard, the one who hurt Tohru._

Shigure entered the bar minutes later. He made small talk as he walked through the bar before noticing the man at the back table. "Hello Hajime"

"Didn't think you were going to make it." The man said pouring him a glass of sake'.

Shigure gave him a tight smile. "Things were hectic at the house" then gave a small smile in Aya's direction. "New meat?"

"She's just some stuck up rich bitch" Slamming down his cup. "Sent her over a drink, trying to be a gentleman you know? And what the fuck does she do?" Shigure shrugged. "Sent it back with a note that said not interested."

_Way to go Aya, you heart breaker, he is already pissed. _"So? What are you going to do about it?" Lighting a cigarette.

"You mean you don't want to try for it?" Hajime asked throwing a glance over his shoulder.

"Naw" Shigure drawled out. _Just to make sure, just incase my instinct was wrong, which I doubt. _"She is to old for me." Giving his drinking partner a perverted grin.

"That's right." Hajime said slapping his hand to his forehead drunkenly. "You like em young." Finishing yet another cup. "Should have been with me then the other night buddy."

Shigure glared down at the table, before looking up. " Why's that?"

"Best damn piece of ass I've had in a while." Shigure coughed quickly to cover a growl rising in his throat. "Yeah I had seen her leaving work several times, when I was on my over here. But she always had some guy with her. Cept that night she was all alone. Friendly too. And just asking for it."

"Go on, tell me about it" the dog said motioning with his lit cigarette.

Hajime laughed. "Dirty old man, huh?" Taking several more swallows of the sake, not even bothering with the cup anymore. "Long brown hair, soft as feathers. Big chocolate eyes. A little school girl outfit. And she was so willing to help me. Of course she resisted to the kinda help I really need at first but."

"But?" Shigure asked, nodding slightly at the snake.

"She eventually took it."

"Whether she wanted it or not?" Shigure said letting his eyes trail Aya out of the bar, just to make sure the man noticed him leaving. Sure enough.

"Exactly" He said rising drunkenly from the table. "Exactly how this bitch is going to" , following Aya out the door.

_That's what you think. _The dog smiled harshly getting up from the table minutes later following the couple out of the bar and down the street.

Aayme was half way down the same alley that Tohru had been attacked in, when he faked a fall. He turned his head and looked up slowly as he saw a shadow fall over him. Hiding his smile when he entered the alley he had noticed several stray dogs rummaging through the trash, they were now growling slightly as the man approached.

"You didn't hurt yourself did you?" Hajime said standing over him. "You think you can tease me and get away with it." Aya scooted back slightly out of the mans reach and stood up, keeping his back to him. "You bitch I'll show you." Hajime turned suddenly when he heard other footsteps in the alley. He grinned brightly has he recognized the man. "Shigure-san, so you decided you wanted a piece of the action after all?"

Shigure smiled and blocked the alley. "Not quite." His smiled widened as he watched Aya, step back and the dogs block the guy in on the other side, growling louder now.

"Huh?" Even in the dim lights of the alley as drunk as he was he could see that the mans face had turned very pale. "What's going on?"

"Are you afraid?" Shigure asked. "Do you recognize this alley?" And he watched as the man glanced around.

"So what you know the little bitch?" Trying to sound tough, but it came out as more of a whisper. He began to move back but stopped jumping slightly as one of the skinny brown strays nipped at his calf.

"She lives with me." Shigure said slowly. "And has for almost two years."

"I didn't think she felt like a virgin." The man said sweating.

"I would shut up while your ahead. Shigure may be crude but he does have some class." The man spun as he heard another voice from behind him. "Plus the girl, is my little brothers ."

"You aren't a man?" His face went paler as he looked closer at the man, who he thought was a woman. Aayame had several snake curling around his neck and arms. "So what's this payback?" Looking back at Shigure. "I'll scream." Watching as the writer walked up to him.

He struggled against Shigure as he felt Shigure put his arms against his back, in almost what could be called a lovers embrace. "I like it when you scream it gets me excited." Shigure said shoving the guy into the wall. Shigure eyes had almost went completely black.

"Call your fucking dogs off." He was answered with a solid punch to the nose.

"You really aren't in the position to give orders." Aayame said weaving his way through the dogs. "But Gure-chan, we really should be going." Spreading his arms out, "the natives are getting a bit restless."

"You are right Aya." Watching as the dogs began to completely encircle the now bleeding man. As if responded to the blood, they began to nip and bit around his feet.

"You mean you are just going to leave me?" Pushing himself up from the wall, back into the middle of the alley. He dogs formed a tighter circle. "Your dogs, you fucking mother fucking." Shigure responded by giving the man a swift kick in the ribs. He watched the man sink to his knees holding his ribs.

"We are showing you more mercy than you showed her." He said spitting on the man. The dogs looked up at him expectedly and he just waved his hand, then turned and began to walk out the alley.

Before long the mans screams mingled with the dogs growling. They waited at the end of the alley till the pleading and screaming stopped, before heading back home.


	15. Alone

-1**AN: As promised here is another personalized thank you…If I missed you this time around or the last time, I will get you. I promise. So without further ado, my thanks for the replies, reviews, and crits to Mew-Shara, Kikyomusdie, CrazyJGirl, Eclipseblood moon, YayforPie and StargazerBlue.**

**And a big thank you to all those who have read from the beginning of this and put up with my weekly updates.**

**This was another sucky week, as I was told that there wasn't enough psychical evidence to win a conviction, so the bastard was just charged with assault and battery. But anyway on to Tohru's Story.**

Chapter 15: Alone

The sun was coming in the window when Tohru woke with a start. She glanced beside her, empty, Kyo must have already left. She laid back down on the pillows that he had slept on inhaling his smell. _Kyo you're cured. Your curse is broke. You won't need me anymore. _The girl thought sadly. _It would be selfish to want to stay with you now, to want you by my side now. I used to wonder, I used to want you or Yuki to be my first real kiss, I wondered what it would be like to have you hold me, like they do in the movies. Now even thinking about those things, makes me sick and shaky. Kyo, you can have a normal life now, but I can't give you that normal life._ She got up and looked in the mirror. For a few seconds she was in shock, she put her hand to head and pulled on the short, uneven strands. _My hair, did I really do that to my hair?_

"Oh you're up?" Shigure said from behind her. He watched as the girl jumped slightly. _Don't worry Tohru, he won't hurt you again._ He smiled at the memory of the guys screams.

"Yes, I'll um I'll make you some breakfast", bowing slightly. _I've been to much of a burden to everyone in this house as it is._

"No worries, Kyo fixed some pancakes, before he left. He said you showed him how." The dog replied smiling. "How are you feeling this morning, Tohru-kun?"

"Tired." She answered nervously tugging on her shortened hair.

"Would you like me to take you to the beauty shop later today?" Watching her as she ran her hands through it several times.

"No, No, that would be No. I'll have Uo-chan or Hana-chan even it up." She wrapped her robe around her and looked up at Shigure. He was smiling and leaning against the door, but he had dark circles under his eyes and looked tired. He stifled a yawn with his hand, then she noticed his knuckles, they were scrapped and sore looking "What happened to your hand Shigure-san?"

"Oh nothing much sometimes I really just feel like hitting things, its good to let it out every now and then." Winking at her, tiring his best to coach her into a real smile. "Tohru-kun? You wouldn't mind if I went back to bed for a little while and left you on your own" Yawning again. "I was out to late."

"Oh yes" Trying to sound cheerful. "Don't let me keep you up." Giving the writer her best impersonation of her old smile.

He smiled back at her and scuffed her hair. "Its cute." Then made his way down the hall.

She smiled at the memory of Kyo and showing him how to make pancakes this past summer. She glanced around, _they even cleaned up some._ She fixed herself a cup of tea and went out to the front porch to sit.

The sky was starting to cloud up, but the air was still warm bordering on hot. Her mind was a swirl of confusion, the one question that had plagued her since last night, when she fell asleep against Kyo. _Do I stay or do I go? I want to cling to him, I love him, there I admit it I love Kyo, I'm in love with him. I want to stay here with them, they are my family. But am I really being fair to them?_ She drifted off further into her own mind as it began to rain. Her body shivered slightly as it began to register to the cool drops. She glanced up towards the trees then to the sky. _WHY? WHY?_ A broken hearted, animal-like scream tore itself from her throat, as it began to rain harder. Her skin was soon soaked through her clothes, her hair matted to her head. She walked farther into the yard, not really thinking just riding the pain. The tears were mixed with the late summer rain. When she reached the border of the yard, she fell to her knees another scream tore from her throat as she began tearing at the grass. '_Its good to let it out every now and then.'_ And she gave herself completely over to the pain and rage as it coursed through her body.

Hatori pulled his car into Shigures small driveway. He was shocked at the sight of Tohru, walking in the rain completely soaked. Aayame had called him this morning and told him about her hair.

"Tohru-san?" He said approaching the girl. She looked up at him, but said nothing. "Can we go in and talk? I don't want you catching a cold?"

She looked at he sky oddly as if remembering something. "Haru was right it is refreshing." She giggled slightly.

Hatori couldn't hide the shocked look he gave her. He was more worried everyday, that she was slipping farther away until no one could reach her. "Come on" as he guided her towards the house.

"Hatori, I'm leaving." She stated simply when they got on the porch.

"Leaving?" the doctor asked and moved in front of the steps. "When? Why? Thoru are you ok?"

"I think I might be." She answered. "I have thought and thought, Hatori-san. And I'm not doing anyone any good. Kyo-kun is better, he doesn't need me anymore." Letting Hatori, push her gently into the house.

"Kyo, still needs you." Going to the bathroom to get a couple of towels. "Where would you go?" Handing her one.

"I have some money saved up enough to get a room at a small boarding house in town." She chose to ignore the comment about Kyo needing her. _Who would need me now? That may have been true in the past, but not now,_

"We all need you." Shigure said coming down the stairs, he had overheard the whole conversation. "But if you really feel like you have to go. I won't stop you. I will ask you to please come back."

She began to cry. _I really ,really don't want to leave but I have to. Please try to understand._ "There is a small boarding house, I can afford, its about 4 miles from the school. I can get something better though once I find a new job." Her eyes were sad but determined. "Hatori could you take me there on your way back to your office?"

"Tohru. I don't know if you should be alone." The dragon began slowly watching her face. She just started at him, in that instant in her eyes, he knew if he didn't take her she might try to walk there. Her eyes were pleading with him softly. Those brown eyes so much like Kana's after the accident, they were broken. _I won't let her give up, like Kana did, I won't lose her too._ "I will take you there under these conditions." He leaned forward slightly in his chair. "You will call me or Shigure, daily, in the mornings so we know you are okay. And you will either come to my office or I will come to your place once a week to check on you."

She nodded and headed for the stairs. "I'll be ready in an hour." _I know I should tell Yuki and Kyo bye, but I couldn't that would hurt to bad, I'll write them each a note._ She changed quickly out of the wet clothes and began throwing things into her small bags.

"Are you sure this is a good idea, Hari?" Shigure asked, leaning up against the door smoking and watching the rain.

"No" lighting a cigarette of his own. "But we can't force her to stay, she was alone when you found her. She has always been independent. Right? Some people need that alone time. She needs to do whatever it takes to get her back to herself." He leaned back against his chair, blowing the smoke up at the ceiling. "But that's why I'm dropping her off, so I know where she is at. And that's why we'll be checking up on her."

They sat in silence for the next few minutes, finishing their cigarettes. They both wondered briefly how the boys would take the news. And who would tell them. Then they heard her coming down the stairs. She didn't come back into the living room, she stood at the door with two small bags. Shigure thought she looked quite a lot like what he imagined a child would look like when they were forcing themselves to go bravely into the doctors office. She looked alone and afraid.

"Tohru?" He asked softly, his brown eyes looking like a concerned puppy. "Are you sure?"

She gave him a bittersweet smile. "I'll be fine, Shigure." As she walked out the door. "There's something on my on the bed for Kyo, Yuki and you."

Hatori followed her out the door. "If you want I can hide you a few days at my office, if you don't want to be alone, but want some quiet." He smiled slightly. _I don't really want you alone._

She didn't answer the doctor till they reached town. "I think that's what I need right now." She didn't look at him, but began to give him directions to the house. "Thank you." Almost jumping out of the car as it stopped. "No no Hatori-san, I have worked you to death. I can do this myself." She shut the doors and gathered her bags. He watched her as she walked into the boarding house without a glance backwards, briefly wondering if he would ever see her again.

She checked in and paid for a month. _That should be long enough._ She thought as she walked down the cluttered hallway. She unlocked the door to her room. The room smelt musty and a bit like old fish, glancing around the décor wouldn't do much for anyone's mood. It was small the walls a plain brown. There was a small desk and wardrobe for her clothes. A mini kitchen, not big enough to do any real cooking, in the middle of the room an old twin bed sat. She sat down on the old dirty brown cover and fought back tears. _No more tears. This is what I need. I need to make myself not need anyone. I need this. I need to be alone. I have to prove this to myself. She_ sighed as she opened the bags and began to unpack. She stopped as she reached a picture of her Yuki and Kyo. It had been taken by someone else perhaps Shigure at the Lake house. They had been walking back from the Lake, each boy was holding her hand. Kyo looked pissed off at the world and Yuki had a far-off look in his eyes. She put the picture in the bottom on the desk. _I have to do this alone._


	16. Letters

-1**About time I update. Sorry it has taken me so long, I got really busy. And would crash about as soon as I get home at night.**

**Anyway here it is my update. Tohru's letters will be wrote in _bold-italics_**

**Thank you all so much for your support and reviews. I hope you continue to enjoy the story.**

Chapter 16 Letters

"Shigure, what's going on?" The rat said jumping a bit as the dog came out of the shadows of the kitchen. "Whys it so dark?"

"Where the hell is Tohru?" Kyo came charging back down the stairs in a near panic. "She's gone." He grabbed Shigure, "What happened?"

"Tohru is gone?" Yuki, said dropping his book bag and stepping up beside his orange haired cousin.

"That's what I said you stupid rat." Kyo yelled, turning his anger, for the moment on an old enemy.

Yuki, coolly ignored Kyo, fixing an icy stare on Shigure. "Start talking."

"Kyo-kun, Yuki-kun, calm down calm down, our princess is okay." Shigure said in a sicken-ly sweet voice. Kyo released the writer with a shove. "Tohru, left this for you" handing Yuki a small pink envelope, "and this Kyo-kun is for you."

"What's this?" The hot headed teen asked, ripping the envelope from his older cousins hand.

"It's a letter stupid." Yuki snapped at Kyo.

"Don't call me, stupid." Kyo yelled as he kicked the door through on his way out..

_My door. _The dog though before turning to the sliver hair boy. "Yuki, she left this and she said she needed to be alone. Hatori took her into town." His brown eyes turning sad. Yuki stared at him for a minute longer waiting on more of an explanation. But he had nothing else to say for once.

Yuki picked his things up and went up to his room. He stopped by the door to Tohru's room, leaning against the frame. _It feels like someone has put the fire out._

Kyo headed to the roof. It was the only place that he could go to think. _Why? Why would she leave? Leave me? Leave us? She said a million times that we were like her family. So why would she leave her home_

He stared up at the sky as these questions swirled around his head mixed with memories of the times that they spent here together. The moon was full, and the sky cloudless. He pulled out the letter and began to read.

_**My dearest Kyo-kun**_

_**I'm so sorry that I wasn't brave enough to tell you this face to face. I feel that I should have at least owed you that much. But I didn't want you to try to talk me out of it. If you are reading this, then I really did it. I'm gone. I'm okay as much as I can be anyway. Hatori will be checking up on me. And no I don't want him to tell you and I'm not going to tell you where I'm at. At least not right now.**_

_**I would be lying to say that I don't love. Because Kyo I do love you, I think I feel in love with you the first time I saw you. I know that you love me. But right now that isn't enough. And it would be so unfair of me to be with you now, that your curse is broken. And that you are free, I would just be another curse. Part of me wants nothing more than to just be by your side, to have you hold me in your arms, for us to really be together. I've always wanted that. Remember the night, that Shishou-san, took your beads. How I begged you to stay with me? I just wanted to be with you. But now, I'm not the same person I was. I look in the mirror and there is a stranger staring back at me. I can't imagine ever being with anyone again. The thought of just kissing, makes me sick and shaky. I'm not the same person that I was. Please try to understand. I need this time, to myself. Don't look for me. Find someone else find someone that you can really be with, the way you should be. As much as this hurts me to say, I want you to find someone else who loves you like I never can, not anymore. I will never regret knowing you, loving you or the time we spent together. You mean more to me than my own life. I will love you till I die.**_

_**All my heart and soul**_

_**Tohru**_

_She is in love with me._ The thought hit him hard. He looked back down at the paper, not knowing if the tears were hers or his that stained the bottom of the page. Her letter brought back so many memories, of that night. She was shivering in the rain, holding on to him crying and pale, wanting him to stay. _How could she think that I would ever be able to love someone else. Tohru, I will wait forever for you if I have to. You stood by me, now I will stand by you. "Don't look for me." Right, I'm going to find you and bring you home._

Yuki sat at his desk trying to concentrate on his homework, his eyes kept drifting to the tiny pink envelope. _Did she hate me that much? Is that why she left? Is that what's in the letter? Is this my fault to._ He carefully opened the letter and began to read.

_**Yuki-kun**_

_**Other than Hana-chan and Uo-chan you were the first person that I could call my fried. I don't blame you for that night, it wasn't your fault. I also don't blame you for not wanting to look me in the eyes. I hate looking at myself, all I see in the mirror is someone dirty and broken. So if you see the same thing how could I blame you.**_

_How could she think that?_ Yuki said to himself, staring at his ceiling before beginning to read again.

_**I know that I should have said something before leaving. But you or Kyo-kun would have tried to stop me. I'm not leaving because of you or him. I've left because of me. Please don't hate me Yuki-kun. Please? I will come back home, when I'm able to. I am also not going to be finishing school this year. I'm not able to face all those people and I'm already so far behind. I just need my space.**_

_**You are one of my very best friends, I love you for everything that you have done for me**_

_**Tohru**_

Yuki closed his eyes, holding back the tears. He was hurt and relived at the same time. _Tohru you should know that you would never be ugly to me. I'm glad that you don't blame me. I couldn't live with the guilt and shame thinking that you did._

Shigure was sitting in the dark kitchen finishing a cup of tea. He lit a cigarette and watched as the smoke rose towards the ceiling. He began to wonder about Tohru. _I wonder what she is doing right now? Does she miss us? Is she okay? How do we deal with Akito?_ Hatori had said that it was for the best that they don't mention Kyo's curse being broke yet. He decided that he would just try and avoid the master for a while. He exhaled deeply and watched the smoke slowly spread across the ceiling._ I don't feel any guilt. Any guilt at all over that guy. "Dirty old man" He_ smirked as he flexed his knuckles they were a bit sore still. Bits and pieces of Tohru's letter came back to him. It was almost as if she were standing there in the room, next to him.

_**Shigure**_

_**I can never thank you enough for everything, you took me into your home. You've shared your secrets with me about the family. You made sure that I had a place to stay and food to eat. You are like family to me, except for mom , no adult has ever claimed responsibility for me before…..**_

He crushed his cigarette out and began to pace.

_**I'm not sure when or if I'll ever be back. Thank you for understand why I had to leave. If you can explain it to Kyo and Yuki. I wrote them letters to trying to explain, but I know that they probably won't understand.**_

_**I'll never forget you or what you have done for me.**_

He walked to his room, suddenly feeling his age and older

_**I hope that one day I will be able to come home**_

_**Love Always**_

_**Tohru**_


	17. Hatoris Idea

-1**AN: Thank you for your patience. I actually have about 4 chapters wrote, I usually write when its slow at work, unfortunately it takes me more time to type it out. And I'm pretty much busy 24/7. Thank you all for your support reviews and reading it.**

**Chapter 17: Hatori's Idea the title to this chapter sucks**

Hatori sat down at his desk sighing he rubbed his temples as he thought of Tohru. It had been almost three weeks since she had left Shigures home. In some ways she seemed better, she had an amazing inner strength and she needed it now more than ever. The job situation was bothering her a lot. She couldn't even work by her old building, much less go back to work there. Arisa, had gotten her a job at the convenience store, the first few days of training went good. But on her first night alone, some older drunk guys came in flirting and joking around with her. She had suffered a series of panic attacks, causing her to leave the store unattended. She was fired the next day. But she did smile more now and it was no longer forced but her smile still didn't reach her eyes. Her eyes were different, they were cold and dark.

On his visit last week she has surprised him by having a small dinner fixed. xxFlashBackxx While they were eating she quietly handed him a news paper folder to the article, he had read it earlier. **_"Local man killed by wild dogs."_** Beneath was a picture of the man and a brief description of the "accident".

"That was him" She said in a low whisper. " I should feel bad, the article mentioned that he had a wife."

Hatori sat back watching her eyes as he lit a cigarette. "But I don't all I can think is good." She met his eyes with hers. "Good, he is dead, good." He shivered slightly he had seen eyes like this before. They seemed to burn with rage and hurt. Kana's eyes, Rin's eyes, and numerous other Sohma's eyes who had been broken. axed Flashback

The doctor was jerked out his thoughts when Kyo came storming angrily into his office. The orange hair teen slammed his fist down on Hatori's desk. "This is bullshit. Hatori, I need to know where she is. Something. I need to see her or at least talk to her."

"She isn't ready, Kyo, didn't she say that she would come to you?" He watched as his younger cousin tried to fight back tears of frustration and pain.

Kyo took a ragged breath. "Can't you tell me something? Is she at least ok?"

The dragon felt sorry for the boy. After all he was the only one that was no longer cursed, he could be with the one he loved, and hold her. And to have this happen, then her not even want to see you. Plus her words came back to him. "_Hatori-san, sometimes I miss him so bad it hurts worse than anything else I've felt. I miss Kyo so bad, that it hurts to breathe. But then when I think that I could see him, I know that I can't be what he deserves. _"Kyo, she misses you and she is doing better. Other than that there isn't much to say."

"She misses me?" his amber eyes brightened some. "When? Can I ?"

Hatori calmly held up his hand. "I'll talk to her, but we can't push her."

He could tell the boy was struggled for control again. He wanted to yell, to kick things over but he also knew the doctor would not allow him to see her if he thought for one second it would do any more damage. Kyo finally decided, after all Hatori had also lost his true love, so he might understand. In a hoarse voice he said. "Hatori, I need her, I love her I want to protect her." The teen turned and left face burning at his out pouring of emotion, he left before Hatori could say anything further.

Hatori watched the boy leave, his heart heavy with pity, for the couple. He wanted to help, but there wasn't much he could do. He looked at the clock, it was almost time to go to Tohru's , so he gathered a few things and went to his car.

He arrived at the boarding house it was starting to get dark. The air had cooled considerable during the day. But he saw Tohru in her usual place. There was a small bench in the side garden she as playing with three small kittens. He wanted to watch her a minute before he approached.

"She is such a sweet girl." A voice startled him. "But so sad." The voice belonged to Suki-san, the elderly lady who ran the boarding house. Hatori just nodded his head. "Can I ask you something, young man?" Before he could answer she continued. "You are the only person that she ever sees, are you really just her doctor? I mean I know that it isn't any of my business, but my late husband was 20 years older than me. So if you.."

Hatori cut her off. " I really am just her doctor."

"Its just hard to imagine her really being as alone as she says." Suki insisted. "At least when you come around, she takes the time to fix herself up a bit."

_I figured that much._ "Suki-san, she really is just my patient and a family friend." He relented and added "and she isn't as alone as she thinks she is."

This answered satisfied her and she hollered across the yard. "Thoru-kun, your handsome doctor is here?" Causing Hatori to blush slightly. "I'll put some tea on for you tow." The woman smiled as she watched Tohru's face light up. She approached the doctor caring a little orange ball of fuzz, the calico and the gray one followed behind her.

"How are you today Hatori-san?" She asked smiling as she put down the sleepy kitten.

"Pretty good today. How are you feeling?" Smiling down at the girl. Her hair was evened up by her two friends, into a cute pixie cut. "any luck getting a job."

She sighed. "no, I just get to scared around people, especially guys, except for you. Is that normal?"

The dragon nodded. "It will ease up in time. Can we go in I would like to talk to about something, well maybe a couple of things."

She looked up worried and scared. _Was something wrong with Kyo? With Yuki?_

"Don't worry, everything is okay at home?" He patted her head and led the way into the house.

"You can go on up Hatori-san I'll get your tea." Tohru said and walked into the kitchen. The teas was ready. Suki-san was sitting at the table. "Thank you, Suki-san." She said bowing slightly. "you didn't have to go through all that trouble."

"Its no trouble, just tiring to give you some extra time with your young man. You spend to much time alone dear."

_My young man. _ Her face turned red. "No No No, Hatori-san, he isn't. He is my doctor."

"He said you were a friend." She smiled at the girls reaction.

"Oh yes he is my friend, but nothing more really he is just my doctor." Not looking at the older woman." She couldn't believe that anyone would think that Hatori. _Well it is true, I suppose he is the only person that I spend any time with anymore._

On the way out of the kitchen she heard the old woman say. "He certainly makes a lot of house calls."

"Here you go." Tohru said as she sat the tray down. "Oh" She whispered softly when she noticed she had left a picture of her and Kyo out on the bed. She quickly picked it up and put it in the night stand drawer. It was one of her favorites. It was taken at he beach neither had known it was being taken at the time. Momiji was good at sneaking around and taking pictures. She had convinced Kyo to wade out in the water just a bit. When she got knocked by a breaking wave. In the picture, Kyo had just helped her up, he was holding one of her hands his other was brushing her hair back. His face had softened from his usual hard look he was giving her one of his real smiles. She was drenched head to toe, her hair had gotten loose and was sticking to her shoulders and back as she smiled up at him.

"That's one of the things that I want to talk to you about. Kyo." he watched as she winced. "He came to see me."

"Is Kyo doing good? Has he mo.." She couldn't finish the sentence.

"He is doing good. He spends a lot of time at the dojo, now. He still misses you, Tohru." She nodded wiping her eyes. "And no, he hasn't moved on. He hasn't found anyone. He wants to see you."

"Oh Hatori." She began to cry harder. "I miss him more than I can explain. I try to stay so busy helping, Suki-san around the house. But he is always on my min. I just don't know if I can see him."

"He did say that he loved you." Hatori said.

She just stared out the window. "Its not fair" she whispered. "What else did you want to talk about?" She asked turning to him again. Her eyes no longer sad, but angry. She was no longer crying.

_Tohru, you have changed. It is like you are fighting yourself don't close yourself off to much. Don't allow yourself to become to cold._

"I need a new assistant." He said in his professional voice as she stared at him. "I can't pay a lot, but I can pay some and it isn't hard. Plus you should feel safe."

"I don't understand, Hatori." She said.

"You need a job and I need an assistant." He said simply, though the thought of having her so near Akito, worried him some. _"Don't worry about the little brat, Hatori, I won't hurt your new assistant as long as you and all the other members of the zodiac behave themselves. Besides, I wasn't the one who caused your old assistant to get hurt, Was I?_" The conversation with Akito earlier invaded his thoughts. He shook his head. And smiled slightly as Tohru stared at him, still not understanding that he was offering her a job.

"Are you sure? I don't know anything about medicine." And she began to panic in her old-funny way.

"Calm down Tohru. Its nothing fancy, mostly cleaning my office and doing filing. So will you take the job."

"If you are sure. Hatori-san I owe you so much already. It would be an honor to work for you."

"Non-sense, Tohru" _Just get better and be happy. _"I'll pick you up on Friday morning around 8. I need to be going now." He said as he stood. "You don't need to see me out. I'll see you on Friday."

"Thank you so much Hatori-san."

Once he arrived back at his office, he called Kazuma. "Yes, I figured he had told you. She is going to start working for me, this Friday. She does miss him too."

He listened into the phone, as Kazuma talked about Kyo and a small plan that he had.

"Yes that was what I was thinking, I'll send her over around four."

Kazuma hung up the phone and continued to watch Kyo through the window. Kyo was currently attacking the practice dummy, as if he meant to kill it. _Hang on just a few more days, son._


End file.
